...let ME be grateful...

what would u do for the gospel?

2011-11-27T13:09:00.000+08:00

This was what one was willing to do in response to the gospel...

while i was peeing in china... (forgive the explicitly)

2011-11-24T14:55:00.001+08:00

While I was relieving myself in a toilet in China, straight in front of me was a story that goes like this...

"The story goes, the woodcutter got the job with a good salary and decent work conditions. And so, the woodcutter was determined to do his best for the boss. His boss gave him an axe and on his first day, the woodcutter cut down 15 trees. The boss was pleased and said: “Well done, good work!”Highly motivated, the woodcutter tried harder the next day, but could only fell 13 trees. The third day, he tried even harder, but only 11 trees were chopped down.Day after day, he tried harder but he cut down fewer trees. “I must be losing my strength,” the woodcutter thought. He apologised to the boss, claiming he could not understand why.“When was the last time you sharpened your axe?” the boss asked. “Sharpen my axe? I had no time to sharpen my axe. I have been too busy cutting down trees,” said the woodcutter."

I guess its a reminder for me to slow down and learn to refresh myself in His presence before I go running to do His Work...

long overdue...

2011-10-29T11:39:00.000+08:00

Suppose to have posted this long time ago but never found time to do it. So on this lovely Sat morning where there's no meetings to attend to (Once in a blue blue moon), I shall post this down as a form of reminder for myself as well.

And its about birthdays. I don't know what you look forward to during those moments but I, in a certain sense, don't really look forward to it. But as much as I don't really celebrate and 'care' much about birthdays, there is always a joy and thrill to receive a wrapped gift. But what makes each birthday special is to know that u have grown and mature, seen in the notes people write for u. I guess that my 'love language', where encouraging notes is what I look for.

And my prayer for my 2011 bday would be to be someone who is:

1) Practical yet Biblical

2) Fun Loving yet God Fearing

I mean, God created everything for our pleasure, its just because of our sin that is why things meant to be good becomes evil. And the Bible is meant to teach us about life and how to live it well so why can't one live enjoying the things God created in this world and at the same time live within God's boundaries? I aim to live that kind of a life.

A new perspective...

2011-09-15T14:48:00.000+08:00

Often, it is how we choose to view things. Try understanding election the way Mark Webb described...

“After giving a brief survey of these doctrines of sovereign grace, I asked for questions from the class. One lady, in particular, was quite troubled. She said, ‘This is the most awful thing I ever heard! You make it sound as if God is intentionally turning away men and women who would be saved, receiving only the elect’ I answered her in this vein: ‘You misunderstand the situation. You’re visualizing that God is standing at the door of heaven, and men are thronging to get in the door, and God is saying to various ones, ‘Yes, you may come, but not you, and you, but you, etc.’ The situation is hardly this. Rather, God stands at the door of heaven with His arms outstretched, inviting all to come. Yet all men without exception are running in the opposite direction toward hell as hard as they can go. So God, in election, graciously reaches out and stops this one, and that one, and this one over here, and that one over there, and effectually draws them to Himself by changing their hearts, making them willing to come. Election keeps no one out of heaven who would otherwise have been there, but it keeps a whole multitude of sinners out of hell who otherwise would have been there. Were it not for election, heaven would be an empty place, and hell would be bursting at the seams. That kind of response, grounded as I believe that it is in Scriptural truth, does put a different complexion on things, doesn’t it? If you perish in hell, blame yourself, as it is entirely your fault. But if you should make it to heaven, credit God, for that is entirely His work! To Him alone belong all praise and glory, for salvation is all of grace, from start to finish.” –Mark Webb

Amazing...

Love this post...

2011-09-01T10:35:00.002+08:00

Wondering what to wear? Mary Kassian, the founder of Girls Gone Wise gave some really good and biblical advice by asking readers 3 questions.

"In 1 Timothy 2:9, the Lord provides three guidelines that help Christian women figure out what and what not to wear: "She adorns herself with respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control." Let's examine these three guidelines to help us ensure that our looks are in good order, properly arranged, and ready to display Christ.

Is It Becoming or Unbecoming?

Kosmio is the descriptive form of the Greek noun kosmos (to put in order, trim, adorn, or decorate), which is related to our English word cosmos-the universe. The Greeks regarded the universe to be an ordered, integrated, harmonious whole. Kosmos is the opposite of chaos. So when Paul told women that their adornment should be kosmio, he meant that like the universe, all the parts should be harmoniously arranged with the other parts. It should be "becoming"-that is, appropriate or fitting. Given the context, I believe Paul was implying that our adornment ought to be becoming on a number of different levels.

First and foremost, your clothing ought to be becoming, fitting to, and consistent with your character as a child of God. But it also ought to be becoming to your body type, becoming to your femininity, becoming to your husband, becoming to the other clothes you are wearing, and becoming to the occasion and place you intend to wear it. There's a tremendous amount of guidance in that small word, becoming. It challenges you to evaluate your clothes, shoes, purses, makeup, and hair from multiple angles as part of the harmonious, integrated whole of your life-to line up the seen with the unseen and the temporal with the eternal. It challenges you to bring a cosmic perspective to bear on your everyday decisions.

I like the word Paul chose. It has enormous implications. Kosmio means that a Christian woman's "look" ought to be consistently put together, inside and out. This challenges those who put an undue emphasis on external appearance as well as those who neglect their personal appearance. It's a corrective to women who dress extravagantly. It's a corrective to those who dress seductively. But it's also a corrective to those who think that "holy" means frumpy, ugly, unfeminine, and out of style. Becoming indicates that running around in baggy jeans and T-shirts all the time is just as inappropriate as being obsessed with stylish clothing. It means that a woman's appearance ought to be put together nicely. It ought to be pleasant and attractive-on the inside and the outside.

Is It Decent or Indecent?

The second word, aidous, is based on the Greek term for shame and disgrace. The word is a blend of modesty and humility. When I think about a word picture that personifies this concept, I think of approaching God with eyes that are downcast.

It involves a sense of deficiency, inferiority, or unworthiness. It suggests shame, but also a corresponding sense of reverence and honor toward rightful authority. It's the opposite of insolence, imprudence, disrespect, or audacity. Downcast eyes are the opposite of defiant eyes.

So does dressing with your eyes downcast mean that you are self-conscious? No. It means that your clothing tells the truth about the gospel. Your clothing shows the world that Jesus covers your shame and makes you decent. Your clothes cover your nakedness as the clothing of Christ covers your sin.

Dressing "with eyes downcast" means that you choose clothes that are decent in His eyes . . . not clothes that are provocative, seductive, and that honor nakedness. When you dress decently, you recognize that God ordained clothes to cover, and not draw attention to, your naked skin. You cover up out of respect for Him, the gospel, your Christian brothers-and out of respect for who He made you to be. Decency means you agree with the Lord about the true purpose of clothing and set aside your self-interest to dress in a way that exalts Christ.

So in that dressing room trying on that skirt, take time to sit, bend, and stretch in front of that mirror, and ask yourself, Is this skirt decent? Does it do what it should do? Does it properly cover me up? Does it showcase my underlying nakedness-or exalt the gospel of Christ?

Is It Moderate or Excessive?

The final thing to ask yourself about clothing is whether it is moderate or excessive. Paul uses the Greek word sophrosunes. It means "of a sound mind; curbing one's desires and impulses, self-controlled, temperate." The word indicates that our adornment should be reasonable and not crazy. We ought to rein in our impulses and avoid extremes in fashion, hairstyles, and makeup. We also ought to avoid spending crazy amounts of money or stuffing our closets full of crazy quantities of clothing. We ought to govern our wardrobe choices with a sense of moderation, simplicity, and self-control. If the outfit is crazy extreme, crazy expensive, or if it's crazy for you to be buying another one, then you ought to pass it up.

Understanding the purpose of clothing and asking yourself the three questions, Is it becoming? Is it decent? and Is it moderate? will help you figure out how to dress. And don't forget to include your "Helper" in the process. The Holy Spirit is an invaluable source of assistance when it comes to figuring out whether or not your appearance glorifies God. If your heart is right and you seek His guidance, He will be your personal wardrobe consultant and teach you what and what not to wear."

These are good questions to ask, not just for ladies but also for guys!

humility

2011-08-29T12:30:00.000+08:00

Extracted from John Piper's blog in preparation for a single guys meeting:

1. Humility begins with a sense of subordination to God in Christ. "A disciple is not above his teacher, nor a slave above his master" (Matthew 10:24). "Humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God" (1 Peter 5:6).

2. Humility does not feel a right to better treatment than Jesus got. "If they have called the head of the house Beelzebul, how much more will they malign the members of his household!" (Matthew 10:25). Therefore humility does not return evil for evil. It is not life based on its perceived rights. "Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example for you to follow in His steps. . . . While suffering, He uttered no threats, but handed [his cause] over to Him who judges righteously" (1 Peter 2:21-23).

3. Humility asserts truth not to bolster ego with control or with triumphs in debate, but as service to Christ and love to the adversary. "Love rejoices in the truth" (1 Corinthians 13:6). "What I [Jesus] tell you in the darkness, speak in the light. . . . Do not fear" (Matthew 10:27-28). "We do not preach ourselves but Christ Jesus as Lord, and ourselves as your bond-servants for Jesus' sake" (2 Corinthians 4:5).

4. Humility knows it is dependent on grace for all knowing and believing. "What do you have that you did not receive? And if you did receive it, why do you boast as if you had not received it?" (1 Corinthians 4:7). "In humility receive the word implanted, which is able to save your souls" (James 1:21).
5. Humility knows it is fallible, and so considers criticism and learns from it; but also knows that God has made provision for human conviction and that he calls us to persuade others. "We see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face; now I know in part, but then I will know fully just as I also have been fully known" (1 Corinthians 13:12). "A wise man is he who listens to counsel" (Proverbs 12:15). "Therefore, knowing the fear of the Lord, we persuade men" (2 Corinthians 5:11).

For a man, it is always a challenge to live a humbled life but it is a necessary quality to have to be the man that God wants me to be.

who's the owner?

2011-08-19T17:50:00.001+08:00

Like this blog post from Blazing Center:

“…so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith…” (Ephesians 3:17)

Weird verse, right?

Doesn’t Jesus come to dwell in our hearts when we become Christians? Yes, he does. So what does it mean for Christ to dwell in us even more? Do we somehow get more and more of Jesus’ spirit in our hearts?

While studying this passage, I came across a helpful illustration from D.A. Carson. He used the analogy of purchasing a house. When Jen and I signed the paperwork to purchase our house, the house belonged to us. The realtor handed us the keys to the house. It was ours. We owned it.

But the inside of the house had some seriously rough spots. The bathroom was fully carpeted and didn’t have a shower. The kitchen had nasty, ancient carpet. The walls were all the same, boring, off white color.

So, we had the bathroom completely redone, with tile flooring and a new shower. We had the kitchen floor replaced with tile, and we gave all the walls a new coat of paint. Jen has been channeling her inner design star and has been hanging different photos and pieces of artwork on the walls.

The longer we’re in the house, the more the house reflects our character and personalities.

D.A. Carson says:

Make no mistake: when Christ first moves into our lives, he finds us in very bad repair. It takes a great deal of power to change us; and that is why Paul prays for power. He asks that God may so strengthen us by his power in our inner being that Christ may genuinely take up residence within us, transforming us into a house that pervasively reflects his own character. (A Call To Spiritual Reformation, pg. 187)

Let’s pray that Christ would dwell in us more and more, so that we are transformed into a house that pervasively reflects his own character.

I pray that my "house" will reflect more and more of Him!

never once have we walked alone... (No it's not Liverpool)

2011-08-15T17:46:00.002+08:00

lovely song to remind us of the faithful God...

a sigh of relief

2011-08-14T08:56:00.001+08:00

"vroommm vrooommm" + *flash of light* = OH NO!!!

This was the experience I had a couple of weeks back when I was traveling on the KPE. That flash of light caused such a huge distraught to me that I can't stop thinking about the consequences that will come with it. I just got my 2A license. Which means I cannot have more than 12 points on my record. I already have 6 points from last year and with this possible new 6 points, I am going to have to park my bike beneath my block for the next 1 year to avoid getting my 2A license revoked! And of cos the possibility to pay $150 would mean a hole in my pocket.

Being so distraught, I begin to search the web to see if people had similar experiences and find out what did they do about it, what's the possibility of not getting caught, the possibility of writing an appeal etc. And my fave website that whole week was www.psi.gov.sg where I can check online if I received any summons. A week went by and I got nothing! Both from the web or from my mailbox! I was slowly beginning to think that maybe I wasn't the one that got "flashed" at, or the police are being nice during National Day period to "close one eye" to this. Until 11th August when I went back, I SAW THE LETTER~! Heart sank. Morale dropped. Mind started to churn out a few action plans that will need to be taken.

As I fearfully tear open the letter... Yippee!! I did not get a summon! I simply received a warning to not repeat the offense! So no demerit points and no hole in my pocket! I was so glad and relief that I need not carry the burden of worrying and speculating and worrying over this whole matter anymore!

The whole experience taught me a few things:
1) Do not speed!
2) That time can sometimes numb us and cause us to not be urgent over the sins we committed, just like how I begin to feel less uptight over it as time goes by.
3) That just as I was thankful to God for letting me off this time round, I need to be thankful to God for freeing me from the bondage of sin and it's consequences daily.

"When he saw the crowds, he had compassion for them..."

2011-08-12T08:45:00.002+08:00

The past 2 days has been really disturbing. Disturbing to know that beneath the lives of fellow believers, there are so many so many issues they are grappling with within and it is affecting their spiritual walk with God. You could see them every week, he he ha ha with them, have dinner, talk about things under the sun, but deep down, they are struggling so badly that they are like a steamer, waiting for explode.

They say ignorance is bliss so maybe it's better that I didn't know some of these things. But as I get involved more and more as a leader and as a giver, knowing some of these things would be "inevitable". I recall what I read in Matt 9:35-36, that Jesus felt a deep compassion for the crowds He saw, BUT only because He had spent time ministering to them. How else can a compassion and burden be developed for people unless one is prepared to meet their needs? I guess that this is part and parcel of ministry. You want to have an increased burden for people? Be involved in their needs. If not, whatever you hear just becomes gossips or points of judgment on that individual or worst still, of no interest & impact to you.

God please help me have a bigger heart.

A sobering prayer

2011-07-29T12:48:00.002+08:00

A sobering prayer to make in the age where things have become relative and man more twisted...

We come before You today to ask Your Forgiveness and seek Your direction and guidance.
We know Your Word says, ''Woe to those who call evil good,'' but that's exactly what we have done.
We have lost our Spiritual equilibrium and inverted our values.
We confess that; we have ridiculed the absolute truth of Your Word and called it pluralism;
We have worshipped other gods and called it multiculturalism;
We have endorsed perversion and called it an alternative lifestyle;
We have exploited the poor and called it the lottery;
We have neglected the needy and called it self preservation;
We have rewarded laziness and called it welfare;
We have killed our unborn and called it choice;
We have shot abortionists and called it justifiable;
We have neglected to discipline our children and called it building self-esteem;
We have abused power and called it political savvy;
We have coveted our neighbor's possessions and called it ambition;
We have polluted the air with profanity and pornography and called it freedom of expression;
We have ridiculed the time-honored values of our forefathers and called it enlightenment.
Search us, O God, and know our hearts today; try us and see if there be some wicked way in us; cleanse us from every sin and set us free.
Guide and bless these men and women who have been sent here by the people of this state and who have been ordained by You, to govern this great state of Kansas.
Grant them your wisdom to rule and may their decisions direct us to the center of Your Will.
I ask in in the name of your Son, The Living Savior, Jesus Christ

what is love...

2011-07-29T09:35:00.001+08:00

Excerpt from a book:
- Love is never sure apart from commitment
- Love is never sane apart from conscience
- Love is never safe apart from character
- Love is never stimulated apart from community
- Love is never seized apart from courage

Such a high calling...

issue of free will...

2011-07-26T13:12:00.001+08:00

Like what is concluded over this issue of "Man has the will to decide to not chose God"...

We conclude that fallen man is still free to choose what he desires, but because his desires are only wicked he lacks the moral ability to come to Christ. As long as he remains in the flesh, unregenerate, he will never choose Christ. He cannot choose Christ precisely because he cannot act against his own will. He has no desire for Christ. He cannot choose what he does not desire. His fall is great. It is so great that only the effectual grace of God working in his heart can bring him to faith.

Favourite quote for the week

2011-06-22T16:55:00.002+08:00

Heard this during last Sunday's sermon,

"God rewards the Faithful with more work!"

How true. To the faithful servant, the Master gave more talents. So it is good to be busy!

the lost of a loved one...

2011-05-15T22:36:00.001+08:00

Today marks the day where I lost my granny to death... And I want to remember it...

true liberty

2011-05-09T09:23:00.003+08:00

Was reading this article during my QT on Gal 5:13-18,

"True liberty is maintained in a nation only when the vast majority of the population exercises self control: curbing one's own freedom for the good of others, and for the benefit of the soul. Law and self-control are opposites of a scale. The more a nation's people exercise self control, the fewer laws they will need to govern them; the less they exercise self control, the more laws they will need."

In view of the GE that has passed, probably then just looking at the government, I should look at how I conduct myself, rather than just thinking about exercising my "rights". More so as a believer, may my actions draw people to the heavenly kingdom I belong in.

the never ending cycle...

2011-04-20T08:30:00.002+08:00

Just had P.O.D this morning and we were just talking about how many of us are caught in this cycle of chasing one thing after another. It never seems to end. Like the song "The Climb" says, there always seem to be another mountain to climb and conquer. At one point in time, it will just lead one to wonder, "When will this ever end?". Students in particular would find themselves mugging to get better grades but to what point will one be satisfied? Just a little more?

I guess I am somehow caught in this wild goose chase as well. The desire to upgrade and be able to do many things is somehow a habit that I need to learn to manage. Lest I think I am freed from this as a full timer, I have to learn to grapple with going for courses/workshops/seminars/programs/licenses to "upgrade" myself.

Came across this poem from Micheal's FB, which nicely sums up what I need to remind myself before I get lost in the cycle again:

"It was Spring, but it was Summer I wanted;
The warm days and the great outdoors.
It was Summer, but it was Fall I wanted;
The colorful leaves and the cool, dry air.
It was Fall, but it was Winter I wanted;
The beautiful snow and the joy of the holiday season.
It was Winter, but it was Spring I wanted;
The warmth and the blossoming of nature.
I was a child, and it was adulthood I wanted;
The freedom and the respect.
I was 20, but it was 30 I wanted;
To be mature and sophisticated.
I was middle-aged, but it was 20 I wanted;
The youth and the free spirit.
I was retired, but it was middle-aged I wanted;
The presence of mind without limitations.
My life was over, and I never got what I wanted."
Jason Lehman, who was 14 years old when he wrote this poem.

May my priorities be shaped by Christ's death and resurrection, not what I want or what the society tells me I need...

Am I Proud? I think i am...

2011-04-18T09:12:00.002+08:00

Pastor Mark Driscoll gives 10 good questions to ask one self to see how badly proud we are:

The Pride Test

1) Do you long for a lot of attention?
> Do I demand a lot of attention? And if people are talking but I am not the center of attention, do I make a way to get all the attention to myself?

2) Do you become jealous or critical of people who succeed?
> Do I think I can do better that the other guy, go negative on people's success and become overly critical?

3) Do you always have to win?
> Do I even resort to cheating at board games!? Can I afford to lose?

4) Do you have a pattern of lying?
> Under lying is pride because lying is usually, “You’re going to know something about me that doesn’t put me in a favorable light and I want to be seen in a favorable light so I will lie, even if it’s a little thing. Just so that I’m perceived as being someone I’m truly not.” Under lying is pride. Do I lie to make myself look better and I lie to make other people look worse so I can look better in comparison?

5) Do you have a hard time acknowledging you were wrong?
> Do I have difficulty confessing and acknowledging my sin, until I get caught? And even when I get caught, I put up a fight. I blame shift, get emotional, I say, “I don’t like the way you showed me my sin!”

6) Do you have a lot of conflicts with other people?
> There are a lot of conflicts between the proud and the proud. They’re always going at it. Sometimes there’s conflict between the proud and the humble. Very rarely is there massive conflict between the humble and the humble.

7) Do you cut in line at the store, airport, on the freeway, etc.?
> Do I think that “I’m very important, I have important places to go. I have significant things to do.” The rest can just wait. Classic example is on the airplane. You can be on a plane at the very back of the plane, you’re like the last row. You can’t even see the front of the plane. Ding! Everybody jumps out of their seats and they’re all fighting to get in line to go nowhere! It doesn’t matter where you’re in line, getting off the plane is going to be a while. You can cut in front of one person, you know what that does? Nothing, nothing. But it’s just a way of saying, “Yes, there are hundreds of us, but at least I’m better than that one. I’m very important.” Do I cut?

8) Do you get upset when people do not honor your achievements?
> Do I think “They didn’t even say thank you. They didn’t even send a card saying, ‘Hey, thanks.’ They never— nobody ever honors me. Nobody ever acknowledges— Why do I even bother? Nobody even says good job! Oh, wait a minute, that’s right, I’m supposed to wait for Jesus to say, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant,’ and that day’s still coming.”

9) Do you tend more toward an attitude of entitlement or thankfulness?
> “Hey, I deserve that! I’ve worked hard! I really made a sacrifice. This is what I have coming to me.” Or thankfulness? “You know what? I deserve hell. Everything else is a gift. Thanks, Lord. I’m grateful for whatever.” Proud people, they feel like they deserve. They have this sense of entitlement. Humble people say, “Thanks, Lord. That you would give gifts to your enemies, that’s great.”

10) Do you honestly feel you are basically a good person and superior to others?
> In your heart, there’s sort of this smugness, this superiority, thinking, “You know what? Most people are pretty stupid and I’m pretty smart. And most people are not a real gift to the planet and I’m superior to them. I’m basically better than most people.”

You can see the full sermon here.

Very good questions to ask and constantly keep myself in check with...

Press on and just fight the good fight!!

2011-04-08T19:37:00.002+08:00

He is good... Indeed things may seem to bad at this present moment, but as Christians, we have a hope... This life is not all that is to it... I pray that not only may I start the race, but may I end the race well...

Do you wonder why you have to
Feel the things that hurt you
If there's a God who loves you where is He now

Maybe there are things you can't see
And all those things are happening
To bring a better ending

Someday somehow you'll see you'll see

Would you dare would you dare to believe
That you still have a reason to sing
Cause the pain that you've been feeling
It can't compare to the joy that's coming
So hold on you gotta wait for the light
Press on and just fight the good fight
Cause the pain that you've been feeling
It's just the dark before the morning

My friend you know how this all ends
You know where you're going
You just don't know how you'll get there
So say a prayer

And hold on cause there's good for those who love God
But life is not a snapshot
It might take a little time but you'll see the bigger picture

Would you dare would you dare to believe
That you still have a reason to sing
Cause the pain that you've been feeling
It can't compare to the joy that's coming
So hold on you gotta wait for the light
Press on and just fight the good fight
Cause the pain that you've been feeling
It's just the dark before the morning

Once you feel the weight of glory
All your pain will fade to memory
Once you feel the weight of glory
All your pain will fade to memory, memory, memory

Would you dare would you dare to believe
That you still got a reason to sing
Cause the pain that you've been feeling
It can't compare to the joy that's coming

Would you dare would you dare to believe
That you still got a reason to sing
Cause the pain that you've been feeling
It can't compare to the joy that's coming

Come on you've gotta wait for the light
Press on and just fight the good fight
Cause the pain that you've been feeling
It's just the hurt before the healing
Oh the pain that you've been feeling
It's just the dark before the morning
Before the morning

what really goes down within...

2011-04-04T20:08:00.004+08:00

It is quite scary how hypocritical man (in general) can be. I read about how a ST writer accidentally mixed up his personal twitter account and with the ST twitter account and tweeted something vulgar, which was sent to all who were following ST's tweets. I read about how Wayne Rooney celebrated his hat trick with a nicely strung up vulgar phrase in front of the TV camera and apologized to the public after that, saying that it was done out of excitement.

Isn't that scary? That before some people we position ourselves as a goodie-two-shoe, presentable, reputable, admired and well cultured so as to either get into their good books or live up to the social norm/expectations, but deep within if we had a choice, we rather rant, curse, don't care, do what we want. And it is sad that the Christian community is not spared from this double standard as well.

It is commonly said that we are who we really are when we are alone. I pray that what people see in me and who I really am within will be the same and not different.

I REFUSE!!!

2011-03-29T10:58:00.000+08:00

One of my fave Christian artist, Josh Wilson's new song called "I Refuse". What makes this awesome is not just the rhythm but the very difficult words to live up to.

Sometimes I,
I just want to close my eyes
And act like everyone’s alright
When I know they’re not.
This world needs God
But it’s easier to stand and watch.
I could pray a prayer and just move on
Like nothing’s wrong.

But I refuse.

‘Cause I don’t want to live like I don’t care.
I don’t want to say another empty prayer.
Oh, I refuse to
Sit around and wait for someone else
To do what God has called me to do myself.
Oh, I could choose
Not to move but I refuse.

I can hear the least of these
Crying out so desperately,
And I know we are the hands and feet
Of you, oh God.
So, if you say move,
Then it’s time for me to follow through,
And do what I was made to do.
Show them who you are.

‘Cause I don’t want to live like I don’t care.
I don’t want to say another empty prayer.
Oh, I refuse to
Sit around and wait for someone else
To do what God has called me to do myself.
Oh, I could choose
Not to move but I refuse.

To stand and watch
The weary and lost
Cry out for help.
I refuse
To turn my back
And try and act like all is well.
I refuse
To stay unchanged,
To wait another day,
To die to myself.
I refuse
To make one more excuse.

‘Cause I don’t want to live like I don’t care.
I don’t want to say another empty prayer.
Oh, I refuse to
Sit around and wait for someone else
To do what God has called me to do myself.
Oh, I could choose
Not to move but I refuse.

what am I focusing on?

2011-03-28T13:05:00.000+08:00

I like what Dr. Ho mentioned in the sermon yesterday. It goes something like this...

"Sometimes in life, we focus on so many other inconsequential things that we fail to focus on things that are more important..."

This was mentioned in response to the various man-made and natural disasters that happened in Libya, Christchurch, Japan, Myanmar etc. He gave the example of how a couple can quarrel over who does the household chores, why is the toilet seat not lifted up when the husband uses the toilet etc. but at the next moment, when a tsunami hits the house, none of these little things will matter any more. Wouldn't it be better if the time spent on quarreling, be spent on developing a quality relationship as a couple?

I find it so true. Perhaps sometimes I am so narrow minded, just worried about my own life and problems, that I fail to see that out there, there are bigger issues and that the world don't revolve around me. Rather than worry about why my lay ups are not going into the basket or why my running pace is inconsistent or why my hair is dropping, maybe I should be focusing on things that are more important and of eternal worth!

fave rock band!

2011-03-21T17:27:00.002+08:00

Yellowcard simply rocks~! Hope their new album will be a big hit...

i am an individual... in a community of people...

2011-03-19T17:01:00.004+08:00

Not the first time I realized this but I am really an individual kind of person. I prefer to do things alone, complete stuff alone, spend time alone and can pretty much live alone (I think). Though I must say that I really treasured some the relationships I had/have. But as a redeemed sinner, I think it will be quite dumb and dense for me to hold on to this idea that I can live life as an individual for a few reasons:

- God created me to have a personal relationship with Him
- God, as the Trinue God, enjoyed the relationship with the Son and the Holy Spirit
- God saved me to a community of like-minded believers
- God called me to love others, especially fellow believers
- God can teach us many things from the community He placed us in

No doubt there is time for my self, but I guess learning to open up to others as I journey on, can be very enriching and beneficial for my growth as a believer. Come on, how many experiences can one person go through? How many answers can one have to everything that is thrown at him/her? Talking and working through with other like-minded people can make this journey so much more enjoyable and manageable.

So, gotta be less full of my self and more of others in my life!

are you a thinker? or a cruiser?

2011-03-11T15:42:00.005+08:00

The past 2 days has been interesting. Somehow, when I sit down and listen to some people talk about life, events, issues and their thoughts and views about it all, I realized I am so far away from being a thinker I think I was. Even further is how the thoughts of these people can be grounded and guided by God's Word. Compared to some of these "real thinkers", I pale in comparison.

So many things are happening in our day to day life. But how many of us would take time to think about these events, consider it's impact and see what God has to say about it? Perhaps we are too caught up in our own world and it's set of problems. But still, how many of us will take time to think, consider and see what God has to say over the events of our life? I guess many of us would simply cruise through life, take things as it comes and only seriously consider these things when we are questioned. Worst is when we begin to interpret those events with a wordly and human perspective, leaving God out of the picture. (Note: No good Christian would say that God is out of the picture, it is just that He has no say in it)

God's Word and the real life cannot be disconnected. It is precisely for this reason that God left us His Word, to tell us how we should live as His Creation. But yet we do not turn to it to help us understand about life and it's events. Then how can what 2 Tim 3:16-17 promised take place? No wonder we live defeated lives sometimes...

I pray that God would give me eyes to be observant about the things around me and a keen mind to think through some of these things and events He allows to happen in my life so that I may be a man of God, equipped for every good work...

simply amazing...

2011-03-10T09:58:00.002+08:00

This is really touching... The kind of earnestness and joy exhibiting from these believers put me to shame...

I guess this is when things come easily, the level of appreciation drops and we will begin to take things for granted. Perhaps that is why people are less appreciative of the things that are being provided for them. It becomes viewed as an entitlement than a privilege. It's a tough prayer but God, I pray that Prov 30:7-9 may be true of my life:

7 Two things I ask of you;
deny them not to me before I die:
8 Remove far from me falsehood and lying;
give me neither poverty nor riches;
feed me with the food that is needful for me,
9 lest I be full and deny you
and say, “Who is the LORD?”
or lest I be poor and steal
and profane the name of my God.

sad... but happy...

2011-03-09T08:50:00.004+08:00

I love Stephen Altrogge's thoughts on life. He puts it so succinctly and yet so real. Here's one post that speaks a lot to me...

"It can be so discouraging when we encounter trials. It can be confusing and discouraging, and we can wonder what God is really up to. It can seem like God is distant and far off, or like things are spiraling out of control.

But they’re not. John Newton provides this wonderful reminder:

He drank off the full cup of unmixed wrath for us; shall we then refuse to taste of the cup of affliction at his appointment, especially when his wisdom and love prepare it for us, and proportion every circumstance to our strength; when He put it into our hands, not in anger but in tender mercy, to do us good, to bring us near to himself; and when He sweetens every bitter draught with those comforts which none but He can give? Let us rather say, None of these things move us, neither do we count anything on this side of eternity dear, so that we may finish our course with joy and run with patience the race which is set before us. (Letters of John Newton, pg. 50)

Every trial is prepared by the gracious hands of our Father, and they are given to us not in anger, but in tender mercy. And when God gives us trials, he provides comfort in the midst of those trials that only he can give. He sweetens the bitter draught with experiences of his grace and strength.

God ordains trials, not to push us away from him, but to draw us near to him."

–

http://www.theblazingcenter.com/2011/03/the-sorrows-that-come-from-gods-hand.html#idc-container

It is a timely reminder as I recall the last trial the Lord put me through, that His purpose is to draw me closer to Him and not further away. If I believe God is all wise, He will have the best in mind for me, even though by human standards, things seem bad and don't make sense at all. Can my understanding of who God is then tide me through those tough moments rather than breed bitterness & apathy within me? I'm glad that at the last trial, He has drawn me closer to Him than further away. :)

I strongly encourage you to subscribe to his blog posts.

What kind of man do I wanna be?

2011-03-08T15:57:00.005+08:00

Haddon Robinson mentioned this in one of the podcast:

"It is sadly possible that before we became a Christian, we understand that our salvation is by faith and not works. But after we became a Christian, we think that we have to work in order to become a godly person. We may not say that, but we believe it is true when we begin to put our assurance in the Christian services that we do..."

It is a scary thought to think that it is possible for me to find my identity in what I do rather than what Christ has done, especially as a youth worker. And I know I am falling for it when I find myself changing and making slight adjustments so as to avoid people passing negative comments about my behavior and actions. (e.g. Do I go to church on time so that the leaders will not "nag" at me? Do I have my Q.T so that when people question, I can say with confidence that "Yes, I did it"?) It is sadly possible than that I am living for man's approval and not God's when I think this way.

Just as was mentioned during one of the sermons,

"Repentance is not about making slight adjustments, it is about uprooting the root of the problem..."

I guess as sinful humans who are wicked in our mind, we would find ourselves conforming to the structure we are in in order to look "normal" and avoid trouble. But conforming to the structure need not necessarily mean that our hearts are sanctified and changed. It just makes one think that he/she is ok as long as he/she follow what the structure demands. But God is not looking for conformists, He is looking for men and women who are aware of their sinful condition before a holy God and truly desires to repent in order to please Him and Him ALONE.

May I live to be a man who seeks the approval of God and God alone...

"Total Depravity" seen in a new light...

2011-03-03T16:34:00.002+08:00

It has really been a long time since I am so worked up and felt like using brute force to get a message across. Here are some things I was irked by:

- It irks me when people are unappreciative and extremely vocal about it.
- It irks me when people think so big about themselves and think that the whole world revolves around them.
- It irks me when people think that the system is protecting them and there is close to nothing I can do about it.
- It irks me when people use words that they don't understand and are very happy about it.
- It irks me when people don't listen and makes a mess of everything.
- It irks me when people make fun and insult you and you have to swallow it.

But I guess what really irks me is when I am not in control.

I really admire people who are doing social work with the youths-at-risks. The work they do is so important, so needful, yet they are the ones who are often unappreciated and underpaid to do this difficult task. It is no wonder social workers get burnt out quite often. I would too (I rather work at Macdonald's and prepare the hamburgers because I happen to type this in Macdonald's) if not for the fact that what sustains me is the Word of God. They are really in need of the gospel. I don't know what else can change them. I don't think anything else can change them unless the Lord does a trans-formative work in their lives. They are, in Calvinist terms, "Totally Depraved".

God I pray that you have mercy on them and that they will one day acknowledge a need for you in their lives. I pray that you will give me the patience, love and tenacity needed to reach out to them.

loving The Script

2011-03-02T14:20:00.006+08:00

really lovely, in my opinion... Such thoughtfulness is what I ask the Lord to put in me, of cos not in the exact manner, when I deal with lives.

"The Man Who Can't Be Moved"

Going Back to the corner where I first saw you
Gonna camp in my sleeping bag I'm not gonna move
Got some words on cardboard, got your picture in my hand
Saying, "If you see this girl can you tell her where I am?"

Some try to hand me money, they don't understand
I'm not broke I'm just a broken hearted man
I know it makes no sense but what else can I do
How can I move on when I'm still in love with you

'cause if one day you wake up and find that you're missing me
And your heart starts to wonder where on this earth I could be
Thinkin maybe you'll come back here to the place that we'd meet
And you'll see me waiting for you on the corner of the street
So I'm not moving, I'm not moving

Policeman says, "Son you can't stay here"
I said, "There's someone I'm waiting for if it's a day, a month, a year"
Gotta stand my ground even if it rains or snows
If she changes her mind this is the first place she will go

[Chorus:]
'cause If one day you wake up and find that you're missing me
And your heart starts to wonder where on this earth I could be
Thinking maybe you'll come back here to the place that we'd meet
And you'll see me waiting for you on our corner of the street
So I'm not moving, I'm not moving,
I'm not moving, I'm not moving

People talk about the guy that's waiting on a girl
There are no holes in his shoes but a big hole in his world

Maybe I'll get famous as the man who can't be moved
Maybe you wont mean to but you'll see me on the news
And you'll come running to the corner
'cause you'll know it's just for you
I'm the man who can't be moved

[Chorus 2x]

Going back to the corner where I first saw you
Gonna camp in my sleeping bag, I'm not gonna move

The Word & My Life

2011-03-02T10:07:00.003+08:00

A couple of weeks ago, I was just sharing with some of my church mates on the sufficiency of God's Word in ALL circumstances of our lives. The Bible is not irrelevant or outdated even though there may be some instances where we cannot find clear cut answers from His Word to tell us what exactly to do, which is something we always ask for, especially when we are in a tight situation. And when we cannot find answers, we begin to operate the way we think or feel like, unguided by His Word. So the Word and our lifestyle are no longer connected, which is ironic. When we tell people that God's Word is truth, how then are we exhibiting it our in our lifestyle? Can others say that the way I live my life is different because I am guided by a Greater Being who left me with His Words & Principles?

A colleague of mine then shared with some of us an article written by R.C Sproul, and I find it reinforcing what I shared and thought about...

"This exercise, of course, isn’t designed to register complaints with the Bible. It is perfect. The exercise does, however, instruct me. I am far less than perfect. It reminds me to not shout where God has whispered. It reminds me to seek to align my priorities with His. It reminds me that while the Bible is not less than a rule book for the Christian, it is more than that. It is the very food by which we live. When we find ourselves troubled by the Bible, either by what is in there or what isn’t, we get a clue as to where our troubles lie. We learn submission to authority is more important than the form of the authority. We learn that while form matters, worship is a matter of the heart. We learn to allow preaching to correct us, more than we correct preaching. We learn that being a godly spouse is more powerful than picking the perfect spouse. And we learn that we have eternity to learn more about who God is.

The Bible, like its author, is perfect. Praise that author that He is perfecting me through it."

For the full article, go to http://www.ligonier.org/blog/5-things-im-surprised-i-cant-find-bible/

music is the language of the heart 13

2011-02-28T16:25:00.004+08:00

One of my favourite hymns is "It is well with my soul". It's particularly meaningful to me not only because the words used are good, but the story behind the song makes the song even more real as I recount what the Lord put me through. I thank God for men like Horatio G. Spafford. They have shown me that it is possible to give thanks to God in ALL circumstances, though it may seem hard and harsh sometimes, because our God is a good God.

It Is Well With My Soul
When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
Whatever my lot, Thou has taught me to say,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

Refrain:
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,
Let this blest assurance control,
That Christ has regarded my helpless estate,
And hath shed His own blood for my soul.

My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!
My sin, not in part but the whole,
Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more,
Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!

For me, be it Christ, be it Christ hence to live:
If Jordan above me shall roll,
No pang shall be mine, for in death as in life
Thou wilt whisper Thy peace to my soul.

But, Lord, ‘tis for Thee, for Thy coming we wait,
The sky, not the grave, is our goal;
Oh trump of the angel! Oh voice of the Lord!
Blessèd hope, blessèd rest of my soul!

And Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight,
The clouds be rolled back as a scroll;
The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,
Even so, it is well with my soul.

being logical

2011-02-22T15:06:00.003+08:00

Saw an excerpt from a book,

‘Gray can exist as gray only because there are the distinct alternatives of black and white. That you might find yourself at times in a situation in which you see no clear alternatives does not mean, objectively considered, that there are no clear alternatives. It simply means that you do not see them. Don’t project your subjective state of uncertainty upon the world at large and claim objective status for it.’

- D. Q. McInerny, Being Logical

Often when we are caught in situations where we need to give a reason for our choices, we sometimes take the easy way out and say "This kind of thing, very hard to say lah... it's a grey area...". But the truth is that our basis is weak, and because it is weak, we say the "politically" correct statement to cease all questioning. But I guess the author is right to say that it is often because we don't see the alternative, we say it's grey. And he is also right to say we cannot put what is subjective (our feelings, thoughts, emotions) and claim objective status for it and expect the whole world to conform to it. Not too hard to understand, but very hard to live it out, especially when we are right in the middle of it.

favourite thought of the week

2011-02-19T16:59:00.002+08:00

"Convictions are built during the peaceful times of our lives. Because when life hits us hard, it simply surfaces our convictions..."

I think sometimes we get the idea that convictions are build through hardships. Though there may be some value in that statement, but as I think about it, I don't think it's entirely true all the time. More than often, when hardships hit us, we become emotional and irrational and unable to put all the biblical principles we have learnt into practice. So what happens is we come out of the experience defeated and upset with ourselves. It is like IPPT. IPPT don't make us stronger, it simply reveals how we fail to meet the mark. It is the preparation before the test that makes us stronger. When we fail our IPPT, we come out disappointed (or nonchalant, depending on the individual) with the result.

So I am glad that in the last difficulty I experienced, I have come out stronger, because the Lord has prepared me by strengthening my convictions within to handle the situation. The reality of His Word became so real, so near, so needful to tell me what's the right thing to do. I am glad He has prepared me during the peaceful seasons of my life to handle the rough waters of life!

this is the day...

2011-02-15T17:42:00.003+08:00

This is the day
This is the day
That the Lord has made
That the Lord has made

I will rejoice
I will rejoice
And be glad in it
And be glad in it

For this is the day that the Lord has made
I will rejoice and be glad in it
This is the day
This is the day
That the Lord, has made!

One of the earliest songs I learnt when I first became a Christian. But it's words seem so heavy and needful to be real to me at least for today...

Despite the rain, the workload, the situations, the difficulties etc. may I be able to echo and sing this song not just today but as long as I shall live... :)

A spiritual commando

2011-02-11T10:22:00.001+08:00

When I first got a letter telling me to go for a Vocational Assessment to be a Commando for my NS, I was excited. It has been my dream to enter into the Guards unit for my NS and now I have a "better" deal! Of cos to some, my response may seem to be crazy, mad and irrational. In fact, for many, going to the army is a waste of time and a dread. But for me, army is like the best time of my life! Maybe its because of the prestige and status that comes with being a Commando that got me all excited. Nonetheless, I could not understand up till today why many young man would find NS, especially if they end up in Commandos, pointless, torturous, unfruitful etc.

But I realize that the very same attitude I detest about guys who complains about NS is the same attitude I carry into my Christian life when I meet difficult moments! I complain and I run away. But if I understand Scriptures correctly, in a certain sense, my "vocation" on earth is to be a Christian. And to be a "tough" Christian, it is necessary to go through "tough" training. So, why do I then not embrace those trials and difficulties like the way I embrace my vocation as a Commando?

James 1:2-4 says,

2 Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds,
3 for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness.
4 And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

I now begin to see the REALITY of this verse. I need to grow to become a spiritual Commando!

dreams...

2011-02-10T09:17:00.002+08:00

John Newton wrote this about Christians,

“The Lord has given his people a desire and will aiming at great things; without this they would be unworthy of the name of Christians.”

(You can read the full write up @ http://www.sovereigngraceministries.org/blogs/cj-mahaney/post/2011/01/28/Newton-Aiming-High-Missing-Low-Aiming-High-Again.aspx)

As a believer, we need to dream. And dream big! Because our God is BIG! We need to aspire for great things because our God is GREAT! To dream or think anything less than greatness reflects a poor understanding of who we call or know God to be.

As much as I realize it is easy to say, I pray that God may give me a big heart and a big mind to dream big and great for the work He has given me. But more importantly, the tenacity and the determination to see that dream come true...

a morning prayer...

2011-02-09T09:41:00.005+08:00

An excerpt of a prayer I made this morning...

"Thank u God for allowing me to wake up and feel the ache and lethargy (becos of the run) because it reminds me of how weak I am and how much I am in need of u.
As I led the POD this morning, I am glad to see more young people coming and with a heart to want to serve u. It reminds me that no matter how big the problem I may be facing, your work still goes on and what is the problem compared to the bigger problem mankind is facing, which is a need to hear of the saving gospel.

May I continue to live each day, hour, minute putting u before me and not the problem and issues at hand and to see how You can work Your ways with this life You have given..."

Sometimes, when life hits us hard, it is so easy to get all emotional and clouded and we can't see beyond our problems. When I think about what to eat for lunch, do I even bear in mind there are people who are starving in the streets? When I think about how I cannot play or run better or faster, do I even bear in mind that there are people who can't even do what I do?

I need to remind myself to be objective and think out of the situation I am in, in view of God's bigger picture. I am but a small dot!

"Does Jesus only live among the wealthy?"

2010-12-02T11:02:00.002+08:00

During a session conducted at my area's year end serve program, an interesting snippet of a Korean movie called "Crossing" was shown. During one of the scene, it showed the father who managed to escape to South Korea, going "berserk" after hearing the news that his wife died in North Korea before he could go back and save them. And one of the lament he made was why is God so unfair? Does Jesus only live among the wealthy (referring to the South Koreans) and have already abandon those poor (referring to the North Koreans who went under communist rule)?

I guess this is a common question that will especially plague the minds of people who witnessed how life is "unfair" or who have lost a loved one suddenly. How do we help such people understand and believe that there is a God who actually loves?

Then I read this off a blog,

“If we had been in Egypt at the time when Pharaoh started out to follow the Israelites to the Red Sea, we would have taken off their chariot wheels before they could get under way. But Jehovah did something better. He allowed the Egyptians to pursue and overtake and threaten, and then He allowed them in their pride to go down after Israel into the depths of the Sea…. It may be that God will allow error [or evil] to proceed further and let it seem to triumph, so that by its own presumption it may place itself where it is more effectually crushed…” –Spurgeon

Not an easy thing to swallow. But at least consistently throughout history, God is consistent. He allows evil to happen so that finally man may be drawn to recognize that there is indeed a God who is sovereign and powerful above all. Have to trust that God knows what is best. Again, not an easy thing to swallow.

But we have a hope. Hope of the day when Christ will come back again and where evil will no longer reign. Now that is heartening. :)

thinking。。。

2010-11-19T20:11:00.005+08:00

Came across an article about a 17 year old young lady:

"Ciesemier suffers from a rare liver disease and at age 11 was facing her second liver transplant. But she asked friends not to send gifts: “How many teddy bears do you really need?” Instead, having learned about AIDS orphans in Africa, she requested that well-wishers donate to World Vision, an international charity."

Indeed the question to ask is how many of whatever we are asking for do we REALLY need? I'm ashamed to say that there are many things I want more than I need. Like a pair of shoes for running, another for climbing, another for casual, another one for basketball etc.

In such a consumer driven society, it really takes quite a fair bit to be able to stand out and not buy into what the advertisements are saying u need... So maybe it's a good thing I dun have much $$...

hymns sung in contemporary way...

2010-11-04T08:34:00.000+08:00

02 Be Thou My Vision by PageCXVI

army daze...

2010-10-28T16:25:00.002+08:00

Going for my ICT for the past 2 weeks really threw me off balance. Coming back to ministry now, I have to work doubly hard to re-orientate myself to keep up with the race against time now that the school holidays are round the corner. This really makes me salute and appreciate working volunteers. How they manage their time and the stress they face at work and yet have time to serve the Lord, commendable... I wonder if I do go study, would I be able to still serve the way I am doing... (Though the answer is obviously No, cos availability is gone...)

paving the way...

2010-10-05T10:12:00.004+08:00

I like what Ecc 2:21 says,

Sometimes a person who has toiled with wisdom and knowledge and skill must leave everything to be enjoyed by someone who did not toil for it. This also is vanity…

The way the world works is interesting... An individual works very very hard to gain the recognition and success in this world but finally at the end of the road, he/she can't hold on to those things gain when he/she enters the grave. So what happens to what has been gained? Either it becomes lost or it will be handed down to the next fellow who may not work as hard as the individual did but gets it by default. Some see it as unfair when all the hard work you put in goes into the hands of someone not as deserving. But this is how one would think if he thinks with an earthly perspective.

Or in view of the recent deaths of renowned leaders in Singapore, all the hard work they have put in is now enjoyed by the citizens of the nation. At the end of the road, they may be satisfied and comforted to know that they have done their best but how long will their contributions stand against the test of time?

In view of planning for the ministry next year, the comfort I have is that whatever I plan is to lay the path for others to walk on. I am not building my own empire and whatever good that comes out from the planning, all glory goes to God alone and not myself. And it has an impact that will last for eternity. Now this is the heavenly perspective.

Don’t Worry About Your “Ministry”

2010-09-23T09:52:00.002+08:00

Got this off the blog from "The Blazing Centre" entitled "Don’t Worry About Your “Ministry”"

Over the years, I’ve occasionally had first-time visitors inform me within minutes of meeting them, that they had a teaching “ministry.”

When I hear this I think, “We have a ministry of setting up chairs that has a spot just for you.”

I’ve heard people encouraged to “find their ministry.” There are “spiritual gift assessments” so that you can figure out your particular gifts and potential ministry.

Here’s my advice: Forget trying to figure out your ministry. Pursue Jesus and start serving wherever you can.

As a young believer I was concerned because I didn’t know what God was calling me to in life. A wise man told me: “Take care of the depth of your character and the Lord will take care of the breadth of your ministry.”

Have you ever considered that David was 30 when he was installed as king? What was he doing till then? Building his character in obscurity. For many years he faithfully served his father by watching sheep – not exactly a glamorous calling. Then he spent a long time on the back side of a desert fleeing from Saul, cultivating qualities like trusting God, patience, and faithfulness.

Before God used Moses to deliver Israel from Egypt he spent 40 years in the desert, also tending sheep. Little did Moses suspect that his “ministry” would be to lead God’s flock for 40 years in the desert.

Do you feel like God has somehow “set you aside?” Do you feel like you’re not being very “useful” or “successful” in the kingdom? Don’t focus on your success, usefulness, or ministry. Focus on Christ. Pursue him. Serve wherever and whenever you can, no matter how insignificant the service. God saved you for his glory – he’ll make sure he fulfills his purpose for you.

I think often my focus is wrong. It's not what I can do but what God can do through me. So, gotta work on the depth of my character and let God lead me to the rest especially with the upcoming changes in ministry...

we all have opinions...

2010-09-20T13:38:00.002+08:00

It was a very upsetting day yesterday. Refereeing for a basketball competition left me physically and mentally drained by the end of it. After handling a 40min++ game, I still have to listen to the complains and "advice" given by the coaches and team managers. One particular remark (out of many) made by a team manager got me pretty mad. He said, "You know why in basketball games there are fights? It's because of the referees!" Being nice and not wanted to add fuel to the fire, I simply kept quiet and "embraced" all the "pointers" that were given.

But as I thought about that remark, I think the correct way to phrase it is, "You know why there are fights in basketball games? It's because the players do not have good basketball ethics!" Short of calling it sin, what actually started off as a fun and leisure sport sometimes ends up in a battle for pride and victory at any cost. That's when all the little action and excessive physical contact kicks in and when the referee fails to make a call, he/she becomes the target board for opinions and an individuals' Point of Views. Yes I do admit I make bad calls or miscalls sometimes but I only have a pair of eyes to work with so some some consideration would be very very much appreciated.

We are all entitled to our opinions. Problem is it is subjective to our own standards. Thank God for the Bible so that there is nothing to argue about. So no doubt it was upsetting, but I thank God for the lessons I learnt from it at the end of the day.

what we see shapes our values

2010-08-30T23:01:00.003+08:00

Got this off a Reuters report some time back,

"Romantic comedies might provide 90 minutes of light-hearted fun but the happy-ever-after movies are also impacting people's real love lives, according to an Australian survey.

A poll of 1,000 Australians found almost half said rom-coms with their inevitable happy endings have ruined their view of an ideal relationship.

One in four Australians said they were now expected to know what their partner was thinking while one in five respondents said it made their partners expect gifts and flowers 'just because'.

"It seems our love of rom-coms is turning us into a nation of "happy-ever-after addicts." Yet the warm and fuzzy feeling they provide can adversely influence our view of real relationships," said Australian relationship counselor, Gabrielle Morrissey.

"Real relationships take work and true love requires more than fireworks."

It is so true that many of the values and ideas we hold on to about relationships are shaped by what we see on the media. Who would want to see a show with a sad ending? Everyone wants a happy ending (and go Awwww...) but the reality is such a picture dun come easily. It requires a lot of communication, a lot of working things through, a lot of "quarreling" in order to strengthen the relationship but how many of us are prepared to rough things through before we even think about the happy ending? Guess I'll need to be more careful when I watch romantic films the next time, lest I start comparing and idealizing...

No More Sissy Stuff!

2010-08-27T10:34:00.005+08:00

Got this off the CBMW blog, excerpts of a sermon delivered by the President of CBMW...

"On taking pains to raise boys in a way that ensures they avoid pain: "We are raising our young boys to be way too soft, way too careful, as if the ultimate prize in our parenting of boys is to get them to 18 years old and say they never got hurt, nothing bad ever happened. They never experienced pain. They never experienced disappointment. They have just had a wonderfully smooth life. What you've done, you have handicapped that boy for the rest of his life," Stinson counseled. "He will be a weak, soft, ineffective man."

On the typical local church men’s ministry: "You cannot just put a bunch of men together and assign them to a care group like some sort of E-Harmony for men and think that is going to solve and fix and help the masculine soul. We have modeled most of our men's ministries after our women's ministries -- get the men together, read a book together, hold their hands and pray together and talk about the worst sin that you ever did -- and that ain't happening. Men solve problems. They fix stuff. They get stuff done. When we give men such weak assignments -- we put them on the bereavement committee and the flower committee and the grounds committee and the fellowships committees -- give men a God-sized task that they know requires a man."

On the missiological fallout in the local church of raising boys that are soft: "We're telling our boys, 'Don't jump your bike. Don't climb that tree. Don't fall down, don't get hurt. And then when they are 18 or 17, pastors are calling out for the men in this church -- maybe even particularly the single men to take some risk: 'We are trying to reach this unreached people group. We don't know what's going to happen there and we need some of you that may not have families yet but some men with courage, with ambition, godly ambition, we need you to help.' You think that guy is raising his hand? You told him not to jump his bike, not to even climb a tree. You told him the worst thing in the world is don't get hurt. That's the main thing. He's not going anywhere, and he's not going to pursue your daughter, because he's weak and scared and has no godly ambition. When he gets knocked down he's not getting back up. He has no godly resilience."

I find this so true. In fact, I find this an add-on to what I have been thinking about when I look at the current situation of men. And maybe sometimes I fear the students under me get hurt or unable to take the pressure so I decide to be nice and understanding to them. But will my action cause them to be one with no godly resilience and tenacity? Gotta evaluate how I have been handling the students under my care...

"Pain is weakness leaving the body..."

To serve is to suffer...

2010-08-18T09:05:00.004+08:00

While I continue to mull over what my uncle and mum told me on Monday, the Lord has provided another timely encouragement through an article that one of my churchmate sent.

So here's some excerpts from the article entitled "To Serve Is To Suffer" by Ajith Fernando:

"...When people leave a church because they do not fit the program, it communicates a deadly message: that our commitment is to the work and not to the person, that our unity is primarily in the work and not in Christ and the gospel. The sad result is that Christians do not have the security of a community that will stay by them no matter what happens. They become shallow individuals, never having true fellowship and moving from group to group. Churches committed to programs can grow numerically, but they don't nurture biblical Christians who understand the implications of belonging to the body of Christ..."

"...Sticking with people is frustrating. Taking hours to listen to an angry or hurt person seems inefficient. Why should we waste time on that when professionals could do it? So people have counselors to do what friends should be doing..."

"...In a world where physical health, appearance, and convenience have gained almost idolatrous prominence, God may be calling Christians to demonstrate the glory of the gospel by being joyful and content while enduring pain and hardship. People who are unfulfilled after pursuing things that do not satisfy may be astonished to see Christians who are joyful and content after depriving themselves for the gospel. This may be a new way to demonstrate the glory of the gospel to this hedonistic culture..."

read the full article @ http://www.christianitytoday.com/globalconversation/august2010/index.html?start=1

This once again reminds me of why I am doing what I am doing. It is my commitment to God and to people in a culture that prefers to pursue comfort and gauge success by monetary values.

why so downcast O my soul!?

2010-08-17T18:24:00.003+08:00

Ps 42:5-6a
5 Why are you cast down, O my soul,
and why are you in turmoil within me?
Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,
my salvation
6 and my God.

The dinner I had with my mum and uncle yesterday was a hard but inevitable one. And to think that a few days ago I was so confident that I will answer anyone who "question" about the kind of work I am doing with much gusto and confidence. I realized that it was really not easy to share the reason why I am in full time Christian ministry and what I do to people who dun share the same faith and the same mindset as me. Judging by the world's standards, which is to measure success by your status in the company and your payroll I am definitely way below the average. Which is why I could understand their concern. It is only then I realized that the failure to be able to communicate clearly my job scope to them is causing them to think that I am aimless and wasting my life away. And by their definition, I am in my comfort zone. I simply cannot swallow it down! Do they know how many sleepless nights and how much I must go beyond myself in order to reach out to the youths, manage the volunteers with me, prepare my Bible studies? They don't! And they can't! Because they don't share the same love I have for God and His Work. I was shaken by the end of the dinner, thinking about the way I have handled it and how I should move on after hearing all the concerns they have, which so are valid. (e.g. How am I going to feed my own family next time if I do not have savings, If something happens to my parents can I support them etc.)

But I thank God for encouraging me in His perfect timing. After my BS with YH, he actually passed me a card for my birthday with notes written by the different POD members. I am so so so so so so encouraged by what was written and it has brought me to remember what and why am I doing all this for! It is the young lives that I want to reach out to that they may live lives pleasing to our God. People may not understand, but it's ok because my hope is in God and God alone! (That does not justify my lack of clear communication of what I do to my parents. I will work on that)

As much as these students may have been encouraged by the time I have spent with them, they do not know just how invaluable and timely their note of encouragement has been to me. Thank God for He knows best!

Hearing God's voice...

2010-08-10T18:40:00.003+08:00

As a Christian, we often want to hear God's voice don't we? Even as I was preparing a Bible study on John 10 with the students in my ministry, it is very evident that we should not be waiting for an audible voice to tell us how and what to do in life. God has left us with 2 things to help us hear Him. The BIBLE and the HOLY SPIRIT. But we often crowd out these voices because we entertain the other "voices" that we are exposed to ever so frequently. The media, our parents, our friends or even our feelings are "voices" we entertain then that small still voice from God.

Was reading the book "Choosing God's Best" and I think the author summarize very aptly how we can differentiate between God's voice and Satan's voice:

God's voice...
> Stills you
> Leads you
> Reassures you
> Enlightens you
> Encourages you
> Comforts you
> Calms you
> Convicts you

whereas Satan's voice...
x Rushes you
x Pushes you
x Frightens you
x Confuses you
x Worries you
x Obsesses you
x Condemns you

Yes, it may not be THE list, since it is not Scriptures, but it does give us enough to discern whether what we hear is indeed from God or not. But in the end, what will allow us to hear is voice is whether we have a close relationship with Him. We have that, we'll hear Him. We don't have that, no matter how many gimmicks or formulas or testimonies given will never give us that special moment with Him.

think...

2010-08-06T15:21:00.004+08:00

took this advert off abby's blog...

Think the advert itself speaks a lot for me to consider, especially with the Inception craze nowadays...

slow to talk, quick to listen

2010-08-02T14:44:00.004+08:00

As I remember how the Lord is teaching me to be wise with the words that I say, I probably have to learn to listen more than comment. And listening can be so tough. When there's so many other things to worry about, time is short, environment is distracting etc., making sense of what I'm listening to can be soooo challenging. Nonetheless, this is one necessary skill to hone if I want to continue in the people ministry.

The "Five Laws of Listening:"
Somebody has to go first - when sharing sensitive/privileged information help your friend feel safe by offering to share first (be vulnerable).
Don't compete for airtime - listen more than you talk
Some of the best questions don't have question marks - gather more information by making requests in the form of a statement (ex. Tell me about your family. I'd like to know more about that. Explain how that happened.)
Say it again - tell your friend what you think you heard her saying so she can correct your perceptions
Ask tough questions gently - be prepared to answer whatever questions you ask

talk and talk and talk

2010-07-16T22:03:00.004+08:00

I did a lot of talking this week. Here's some key "talks",

> Talked to a potential volunteer on how she should consider coming on-board and join us in this work of reaching out to young people even when she enters into university. Uni life has a way to sap your time and energy without you knowing if you are not focused. Choosing to serve intentionally could just be the thing that keeps one's sanity in the midst of all the busy-ness in uni.
> Talked to a few volunteers on how they need to decide and be very clear what their end goal in life is, so that it will shape their present decision making and not leave them living in regret. Sometimes we lose sight of what we do and why we do it.
> Talked to some students on the importance of God's Word in our lives as Christians and how we need to be personally convinced that His Word really matters, discipline ourselves and open our eyes big to see God working in our lives. I parallel it like exercising. We all know exercise is good but many of us dun get down to doing it. But when we set in our minds that it is REALLY important, we discipline and force ourselves to go exercise consistently, then we reap the fruit of our labor, isn't that feeling great? Wouldn't that feeling push us to keep it up? I guess it's the same with God's Word. I need to be personally convicted of it's importance, discipline myself to do it and pray that God will let me reap a harvest from obeying His Word.

Somehow they are all related. How can one truly know what to do with this life one has? Only when one allows his/her life and decisions to be shaped by the Word of God, which many of us find it boring and dun see it's true value. But to be able to comprehend and be in love with God's Word, I guess it's a work that only the Holy Spirit can do in a person's life.

So thank God for my mouth and the thoughts I had but more importantly I pray that all the talk I did this week will continue to be convictions that I live out for God...

desperation drives...

2010-07-11T18:49:00.004+08:00

Often when I read of disasters, persecutions and bizarre murder cases, the first thing that comes to my mind is why is evil so prevalent and indescribably wicked? Especially in the newspapers where you read of crazy crimes and insane treatment of fellow human beings, it is very saddening. Or when I read abut Christians undergoing persecution and much trial in their walk with God, it is agonizing.

But it was a timely reminder during service today that the reason such evil are prevalent in society is because the devil is desperate. Just like desperation drives one to do things unimaginable, the devil is desperate to get people away from the narrow gate and desperate to bring them away from the presence of God and is trying all ways and means to do so. Yes I should be sad, but I should also be comforted to know that when evil befalls and things get difficult, it is a sign that the devil is panicking and all the more I should remain steadfast. It is a confirmation that the devil feels threatened and wants to derail me.

I should panic, when things are going well for me and there seems to be nothing much happening in my Christian walk. No trials, no temptations, no hardship. Instead of it meaning that I am perfect, which is impossible in this perishable body, it could be that I am no threat to the devil and he is happy that I remain in this deluded form! That is a scary thought. Let me "look forward" to difficulties in our Christian journey and hang on to the hope that He is coming back again someday to establish a new Kingdom!

so many deaths...

2010-07-06T15:38:00.003+08:00

The past month has been one where I read and come to know of a lot of deaths and suicides both from the news and from friends.

When I come to know about the deaths, it just reminds me of the brevity and frailty of life. I can be fit and active but that does not exclude me from the possibility of dying from a sudden heart attack or virus attack.

When I come to know of the suicides, it is just discouraging to know that so many people no longer find meaning in life and think that death can put an end to their "suffering".

Some look to death with fear, others for relief but for me, I look to death with hope because Jesus said, "I am the resurrection and the life. Whoever believes in me, though he die, yet shall he live, and everyone who lives and believes in me shall never die..."

I believe in it. Do you? Because that will radically change the way you view life and death and the way you choose to live this life you have. Death is not the end. It is just the beginning of something better that is to come for those who believe in Him.

a quick thot...

2010-06-26T10:08:00.003+08:00

V.I.T.A.L Camp is over... Feeling a little disoriented after living with a community of Christians for 7 good days, experiencing Christlikeness. Now back in the "real" world and one of the immediate thought I have is the passage that was shared during one of the Daily Focus...

^{Matt 7:28-29}When Jesus concluded his address, the crowd burst into applause. They had never heard teaching like this. It was apparent that he was living everything he was saying—quite a contrast to their religion teachers! This was the best teaching they had ever heard. (The Message)

When I read this, I find it absolutely beautiful. Christ's sayings was exemplified by His living and that drew people to be attracted to Him. I pray that my life may be an attraction for others to God. And if we all can exemplify that in our lives, imagine what a wonderful world this place would be.

just do it... the old school way...

2010-06-06T23:16:00.001+08:00

Was reading up on the late John Wooden, apparently a basketball coach who left a legacy behind for the players whom he had a personal touch on. Every coach have a coaching philosophy and here's one of his maxim:

"Success is peace of mind which is a direct result of self satisfaction in knowing you made the effort to do the best of which you are capable of."

One of the thing I read about him was how he choose to focus on good plays rather than showy individual skills. In a society that focuses on talents and show, I guess Mr. Wooden's style of coaching would not receive much applause in this generation of youths. Probably many would turn him off as a joy killer or unappreciative or find his ways too strict and then run away from training.

I guess it is the same when it comes to ministry. In a society where almost everything is instantaneous and depending on how charismatic you are, who would bother to sit down and spend hours reading the Bible or pound the streets to share the old old story of Jesus Christ to people who are just rushing from place to place?

How I wised I had a coach like him to coach me when I was younger. But I am thankful to have good Christians who has watched me grow up and helped me in this journey.

Nonetheless, he has inspired me.

上海2010

2010-05-26T09:57:00.003+08:00

It has been an interesting trip more so because I got to spend time with my mum, sis and some relatives. Learnt and saw many things but i guess the most important thing is to have been a good testimony before them. :)

One of the conclusions I have is what my sis said as well. Better travel when I am younger... haha...

Trip in a nutshell:
Day 1 - Reach Shanghai meet up with cousin and settle in. Went for many many course dinner + shopping
Day 2 - Went shopping again in the morning before going for a wedding lunch ceremony and dinner wedding ceremony. Basically, Eat EAt EAT the whole day!
Day 3 - Went shopping at People's Square and met up with my friend before heading for a church service. Basically, Walk WAlk, WALk, WALK the whole day!
Day 4 - Went to the expo. Huge place to walk. Walk until I blur. So many pavilions, queue so long. Then went shopping again after that. *bish* But went for massage to end the day. Very very shiok.
Day 5 - Come back to Singapore lo!

Enjoy the photos!

a comforting song...

2010-05-20T23:10:00.004+08:00

Often we think we are alone battling to survive in this world that just drains us so often. So isn't it comforting to know that we have a God to fall back on? And yet so many people resist Him. As I think about what Stellar Kart shares, it is so needful for Christ to be the Lord of one's life.

there is a crisis?

2010-05-18T11:37:00.002+08:00

What makes a man godly? What makes a man willing to lay down his life for God with no regrets like the great men we read about in the past. People like Hudson Taylor, David Livingstone, Jim Elliot, John Wesley etc.? And yes, I am talking about MAN.

I began to think about this during a meeting where we were praying for the "sheep" under our care. And it seems that the "problematic" ones are mainly guys!! What is happening? Then I recall of times when I hear of how many many guys struggle to let go and let God take control of their lives, how they struggle to serve God while pursuing the things of this world, how they seek a "balanced life" rather than a total surrendered life to Him. As much as I say these things, I am also talking about myself. I too entertained thoughts of giving up, of being nominal, of just doing the bare minimum in the community, not wanting to do more for fear of being loaded with more and lose my "freedom".

If you ask me why, I guess it all boils down to the fact that we have now so sunk into the world's value system, we MAN begin to evaluate our worth by it's standards. Too many loves, too many desires, too many wants clouds us from pursuing what matters to God. The early forefathers saw the worth and hope in "leaving their nets behind to follow Him". Do I see my faith in the same light? I pray that this will be so for me and also for the guys in the community I am in. May we truly have a breakthrough and find that doing His work is really "food" that energizes and refreshes us.

what pertubes me...

2010-05-02T21:11:00.003+08:00

Read this on TODAY Online, Voices section:

"Seemingly, there is an erosion of moral values in our community, especially among the young these days. Not long ago, I noticed a group of primary school pupils shouting and banging at some slot machines at an amusement arcade. I asked an elderly supervisor there why he allowed such behaviour to persist. He replied that he risked being harmed later if he stopped them.

It appears that today's youth are devoid of respect for their elders. Maybe schools and parents are overly focused on academic excellence, and have neglected to teach their children the paramount importance of being caring and sympathetic towards others.

We must do something about this sorry state of affairs."

Over at the last Frisbee Competition, a few things really really irritate me loads until I decided to blog it down to remind myself not to become what I am irritated by:

Thrash was just thrown and left all over the place even after repeated announcements, when it should be an automatic responsibility.
Promises were broken and casually forgotten ("Ok, I will shift the table back", but never)
Unwillingness to dirty one's hand. (To clear the trash)
Unwillingness to do beyond one's "responsibility". (To pick up rubbish that is not thrown by the person, "Not I throw one, not I throw one...")

Reading this article and experiencing what happened at the competition, one word to describe the situation. Sad. But I also recognize that the only thing that can change their mindset and mentality is when God do a change in their lives. Things can be taught, but what finally changes a person is when Christ is alive in that person, effecting the change in him/her. Will education solve the problem? It might. But what really will cause the change is when something within the person changes, not without. And I believe only the Lord can do that.

No doubt I still struggle with some of these issues sometimes (the fact that I complain means I am still petty), but I am thankful that the Lord has redeemed me nonetheless because I could very well be much worst than these people I see and read about.

the idle mind is a dangerous mind...

2010-04-27T11:11:00.006+08:00

Recently I have been thinking about the whole idea of "chilling out" and "stoning". Often the excuse I think of for myself is after a day of work/ministry, it's time to rest my mind when I go home and watch some movies/anime/drama or simply sleep early.

But I have come to accept the fact that when I have the idea that I want to stop thinking, I am giving the "Accuser" a chance to fill my mind with other things that are not healthy and get comfortable with pleasures. Further more, that is what will cause me to not put Rom 12:11 into action, which was shared during Adult Fellowship last month:

11 Not slothful in business; fervent in spirit; serving the Lord;

This is my problem. I can be slothful. I can be not fervent. I can be not serving the Lord. And all this is because I compartmentalize my life, doing only ministry in the daytime and choose slack in the night. And that simply reflects a poor understanding of what GRACE is. GRACE is understanding that God gave me these responsibilities, big or small, even though I do not deserve it. And the proper response is to put excellence in it because He deem it fit to entrust it to me, a worthless servant. Of cos I am not encouraging abstinence from all pleasures, but rather to see those as privileges God gives and not entitlements that I must have. Much of those time spend watching movies and playing games can be used to pray for the flock under my care, prepare Bible Study, plan for the ministry etc.

So, conclusion is... Learn to give up more and more of my comfort zone for the sake of Him who saved me. :)

Watcha toking about?

2010-04-27T11:03:00.002+08:00

I'd Rather See A Sermon (By Edgar A. Guest)
I'd rather see a sermon than hear one any day.
I'd rather one should walk with me than merely show the way.
The eye's a better pupil and more willing than the ear;
Fine counsel is confusing, but example's always clear;
And the best of all the preachers are the men who live their creeds;
For to see the good in action is what everybody needs.
I can soon learn how to do it if you'll let me see it done,
I can watch your hands in action, but your tongue too fast may run.
And the lectures you deliver may be very wise and true;
But I'd rather get my lesson by observing what you do.
For I may misunderstand you and the high advice you give,
But there's no misunderstanding how you act and how you live.

The way I live my life is so so so important, yet it is the very thing that I so easily let my guard down on sometimes... I can talk a lot, but finally it's how I live it out that counts...

it struck me...

2010-04-18T20:54:00.003+08:00

that as I met up with many people (some unplanned for) today after service, would it be easier if I was not married? Would I be able to minister and spend time with more people if I was not married?

Finally, is that an excuse? haha.

what's on my mind...

2010-04-16T08:56:00.005+08:00

Read a quote on a book (interestingly on relationships) yesterday and found it very interesting...

Martin Luther once said:

"You can't stop a bird from flying over (or landing on) your head, but you can stop it from building a nest in your hair."

Sounds lame? I thought so too... I mean what has birds got to do with me? Until I gave some thought to it... It is true that in a certain sense we cannot stop temptations from being hurled at us just like how we cannot prevent birds from flying over us. But what we can do is to shake it away when it starts to come near us. As Christians, we have the victory in Christ and can stop entertaining those thoughts that continues to linger in our mind when temptations come. It could be lustful thoughts, angry emotions, "emo" feelings, I need to learn to stop dwelling on those thoughts and allow my mind to be renewed by the Word.

Rom 12:2
2 Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.

Get a grip Tee Ee Han!!

Heb 12:28-29

2010-04-15T15:04:00.002+08:00

Recently the Lord gave me a clearer understanding to this verse which started my blogging "career". I shared this on 2 occasions just last week as this verse both encouraged me & shook me up.

As believers we have a Kingdom that cannot be shaken because Christ redeemed and secured it with His own blood. Knowing this encourages me to go on, even though things may get difficult or when the society pressures me to conform to it's norm. And I am grateful, because I really do not think I deserve it at all, yet the Lord graciously gave it to me.

Now the thing that shook me is the appropriate response we should have as believers. It is to give acceptable worship. What is acceptable? It is not acceptable to us, our own human standards but God's. Not only are we urged by the author to give acceptable worship but to do so with reverence and awe! Being in full time ministry does not necessary mean I am doing what is acceptable, with reverence and awe. I recall the times when I give slip shot and mediocre work to Him due to pressure or complete assignments out of routine/responsibility. Though the eyes of man may think that I am doing a good work, but when it's measured up with God's standards, will God say the same?

And the reason why the Lord desires a worship that is done with reverence and awe because He is a consuming fire. Just like the Israelites, who had to offer to God a complete sacrifice without blemish and witness the Lord simply consume the WHOLE sacrifice, what am I offering to God? Is it without blemish? Is it partial or complete?

This is the beauty of Scripture. There is always so much to gather and learn from it. But more than that, it is like a mirror, exposing areas of concern that one needs to work on in order to be the little Christ in this fallen world...

pain...

2010-04-13T14:41:00.007+08:00

Mon: Run 40min
Tue: Speed Work
Wed: Run 40min
Fri: Speed Work
Sun: Run 60min

After going through this training program for 1 1/2 weeks, I think I have to stop for a week... feeling a pain on my left knee that's causing me to be unable to straighten my leg without feeling much discomfort. Though I'm sad that all my efforts may just go to waste, I learn at least 2 things from this experience.

1) I am not young anymore... It's going to take hard hard work in order to achieve the target I set for myself.
2) I am impressed by the discipline I still have to go through the program! Often I had to combat the inertia and the "weak" me to get out from my bed and put on my shoes to hit the track.

Translate this my day to day living,

1) Since I am not growing any younger, how am I channeling my energy for better purposes?
2) With that same discipline I had, can I discipline myself to watch the important areas in my life?

It's indeed amazing how God can teach me through such circumstances...

God is Love

2010-03-20T17:31:00.003+08:00

As I returned to EH after completing a team building workshop with a church, I walked into the lift and looked at the mirror and saw what was written on my shirt... I think the Lord has been very good and faithful to me as I reflect upon my service to Him in SYFC. Yes, I do not have a "perfect" life like what my friends would have, big house, big bonus, big car, but what I do have is God's perfect love. And I see it in the way people support the work I do and even my auntie who gave me some money to spend for an upcoming holiday trip just when I was brooding over whether I will have money to spend while I'm overseas! Indeed I would echo with what I wear on my body and ask that the Lord would teach me to be contented with His love in my life, all my life.

quote of the week

2010-03-10T22:14:00.004+08:00

"If the task was not DIFFICULT, God would not have asked us to TRUST Him. If the task was not HARD, God would not have needed to COMMAND us to do it."

This is a simple yet profound and often overlook fact when we think about trusting and obeying Him. It is precisely things because are difficult and hard, it should draw us to turn to Him in trust and obedience. This is one hard teaching I am going to take some time to learn and grapple with, yet so essential and fundamental in a Christian's life...

heart heart heartache...

2010-02-20T22:22:00.006+08:00

Pain. Humbling. Sad.

It's a tough thing to swallow but it's a reality. I am an unskilled handler of God's Word.

Through AF, my preparation for sessions, my execution of sessions, Sunday service, it just reveals how lousy and irreverent I have been treating the Word of God.

Feels like there's a need to start from the basics, from scratch again.

Sunday service yesterday delivered the punch. John 14:7 says:

7 If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.

How much of God's word is abiding in me? Studying His Word has become more like a responsibility and a "job" I have to do in order to deliver my sessions and homework. Where is the love? Lest I become like the church of Ephesus who were charged with losing their first love, I HAVE to do something about it.

a glimmer of light...

2010-02-20T22:11:00.003+08:00

God has been good to encourage me through a younger sibling today. He was sharing from Ps 25:8-14,

8 Good and upright is the LORD;
therefore he instructs sinners in the way.
9 He leads the humble in what is right,
and teaches the humble his way.
10 All the paths of the LORD are steadfast love and faithfulness,
for those who keep his covenant and his testimonies.
11 For your name's sake, O LORD,
pardon my guilt, for it is great.
12 Who is the man who fears the LORD?
Him will he instruct in the way that he should choose.
13 His soul shall abide in well-being,
and his offspring shall inherit the land.
14 The friendship of the LORD is for those who fear him,
and he makes known to them his covenant.

It was very apt as I hit a slump in my walk with God and my ministry. And one possible reason for the slump, as suggested from the passage, is a lack of fear for God. Not the kind of fear that makes me shudder because of the fear of losing my salvation, but a way too low view of who God is. The article that the brother shared said: "One tell-tale sign showing that one has a lack of fear for God is when one is more fearful of other things. It could be deadlines, expectations, man's approval, low self esteem etc. When one starts to focus on these "fears", God is then out of the picture." It is like the Israelites when they were asked to enter the Promise Land, they resisted out of a fear of the occupants in the land. They had a too low view of God and a too high view of the situation and environment.

I think I am behaving just like the Israelites. Fearful of the tasks ahead of me and thus give sub standard work and think of giving up. Until I learn to "Fear the Lord", this slump is going to lead me to the downward path...

it's been a sad week...

2010-02-19T17:41:00.003+08:00

Though I'm thankful for the break I've got from CNY (I slept and ate a lot more than usual), when I look at the amount of work that needs to be done still and things I am doing but not well, it just puts me into a "emo" state. Given all the sessions and talk about not wasting our lives away, it is a real temptation to just throw everything aside and be contented to live a "normal" life without things to rock the boat I am in. Am I really that incompetent to be unable to think and work things through? Or am I just unwilling to give up my comfort zones? Judging by the way I would prefer to spend my time, I think my personal space is still very much guarded and until I learn to give that up, I would not be expecting any breakthrough where I am... So what if I am serving in many different areas? All these do not give a good gauge of where I stand before God...

I do thank God for showing me this BIG crack in my life. I'm asking that He help me to sort it out within...

Those who trust in the Lord will lack no good thing!!

2010-02-06T09:02:00.003+08:00

The Lord has been very kind to bless me with good things in my life. I may not be riding a Ducati or having a big bank account like many of my other friends may have, but the Lord has not shortchanged me at all in the past 3+ years as I serve Him in SYFC. Has it been a waste? Probably, in the eyes of the world. Though I have been tempted at times to think of the "What ifs...", I am glad to have been able to make an impact in the lives of the young people I meet daily, and that is not a waste.

My Bike... with my sister's help, I got it. And it's been a fantastic buy. Cheap, economical, not too fast and not too problematic!!

My Macbook pro... With Clarence's help, got it at a cheaper deal. And for Eric who gave me a copy of Microsoft Office...

These 2 items are the biggest "investments" I made so far with the resources God has given me. But these things wouldn't have come about with the help of people who sees the value of the work I am in. And I believe that is God's way of providing for me. So thanks be to God who provide these people along the way!!

what to do leh?

2010-02-03T09:18:00.003+08:00

Was reading a blog article this morning and it answered a question I guess would always be at the top of our minds as Christians. And it is the question of "What can we do and what can't we do as Christians". And the article rightly used 1 Cor 10:23,24, 31-33 as a guide and came up with 4 questions to consider in answering this age old question:

Is this beneficial for me spiritually (does it help or hurt my walk with God)?
Is this beneficial for me physically (since God referred to our bodies as His temple)?
Is this beneficial for my witness (since others are always watching)?
If Jesus was right here with me (and He is), is this something we would do?

Or like how my boss would put it,

Is it a right (morally) thing to do?
Is it a wise thing to do?
Is it a loving (not the lovey dovey feeling but what is best for the other person) thing to do?

But rather than seeing it as constraints for a Christian, I choose to see it as a guide to help me live life in a manner which is fruitful and with purpose. Imagine living with no principles, wouldn't life be very frivolous, direction-less & bias? But even in saying that, I know the immense struggle to stay consistent in living out these principles, but that is no excuse to not work hard at applying them in my life. So God, please help me live out a consistent life!

what a godly man looks like...

2010-01-21T19:38:00.004+08:00

Thomas Watson's 24 attributes of a godly man:

A man of knowledge. He knows God in Christ and is being transformed into the image of Christ by this knowledge. Possession of such knowledge must make him humble: “True knowledge brings a man out of love with himself. The more he knows, the more he blushes at his own ignorance,” writes Watson.
A man moved by faith. His trust in God is a living principle. “He who believes that God is his God, and that all providences work for his good, patiently yields himself to the will of God.”
A man fired with love. “A godly man loves God, though he is reduced to straits.”
A man like God. “Holiness is a man’s glory…The goodness of a Christian lies in his holiness, as the goodness of air lies in its clarity, the worth of gold in its purity.”
A man careful about the worship of God. “A godly man dare not vary from the pattern God has shown him in Scripture.”
A man who serves God, not men. Here, Watson uses servant as a synonym for “fear.”“A godly man leaves the service of sin and betakes himself to the service of God.”
A man who prizes Christ. “Put a glass under a still (water container) and it receives water out of the still, drop by drop,” Watson writes. “So those who are united to Christ have the dews and drops of his grace distilling on them. Well, then, may Christ be admired by all those who believe.”
A man who is an evangelical weeper. What is meant by ‘evangelical weeping?’ Watson says a man who weeps in an evangelical way sheds tears over indwelling sin, over clinging corruption, over the notion that he is not more holy, over God’s amazing love for him, because, in some sense, the sins he commits are worse than the sins of others. Watson calls it “sorrow of the soul.”
A man who loves the Word of God. Watson said a godly man loves: the counseling part of the Word, as it is a directory and rule of life, he loves the threatening part of the Word and the consolatory part of the Word—the promises.
A man who has the Spirit of God residing in him. “I conceive that the Spirit is in the godly, in whom he flows in measure,” Watson writes. “They have his presence and receive his sacred influences. When the sun comes into a room, it is not the body of the sun that is there but the beams that sparkle from it. Indeed, some divines have through that the godly have more than the influx of the Spirit, though to say how it is more is ineffable, and is fitter for some seraphic pen to describe than mine.”
A man of humility. “He is like the sun in the zenith, which when it is at the highest, shows lowest,” he writes. “St. Augustine calls humility the mother of the grace.” But Watson also warns of the existence of a false humility: “A man may be humbled and not humble. A sinner may be humbled by affliction. His condition is low but not his disposition. A godly man is not only humbled but humble. His heart is as low as his condition…A humble man is always preferring bills of indictment against himself. He complains, not of his condition, but of his heart.”
A man of prayer. “As soon as grace is poured in, prayer is poured out…Prayer is the soul’s traffic with heaven. God comes down to us by his Spirit, and we go up to him by prayer.”
A man of sincerity. In modern parlance, he is what he is. Watson writes, “A godly man is plain-hearted, having no subtle subterfuges. Religion is the livery a godly man wears and this livery is lined with sincerity.”
A heavenly man. “Heaven is in him before he is in heaven...A person may live in one place, yet belong to another…A godly man is a while in the world, but he belongs to the Jerusalem above. That is the place to which he aspires. Every day is Ascension Day with a believer.” He lines out six ways a man is to be heavenly: In his election, his disposition, his communication, his actions, his expectation and his conduct.
A zealous man. “Grace turns a saint into a seraph. It makes him burn in holy zeal. Zeal is a mixed affection, a compound of love and anger. It carries forth our love to God and anger against sin in the most intense manner.”
A patient man. A godly man is patient in: waiting, bearing trials, when God removes any comfort from him, when God inflicts any evil on him.
A thankful man. “Praise and thanksgiving is the work of heaven and he begins that work here which he will always be doing in heaven.”
A man who loves the saints. “The best way to discern grace in one’s self is to love grace in others.”
A man who does not indulge himself in any sin. “Though sin lives in him, yet he does not live in sin. Every man that has wine in him is not in wine. A gladly man may step into sin through infirmity, but he does not keep on that road.”
A man who is good in his relationships. Two of the most crucial relationships for Watson are marriage and fatherhood. A godly man, Watson says, fills up the marital relationship with love in accord with Eph. 5:25. “The vine twisting its branches about the elm and embracing it may be an emblem of that entire love which should be in conjugal relationship. A married condition would be sad, if it had cares to embitter it and not love to sweeten it. Love is the best diamond in the marriage ring.” A father’s duties to his children are threefold: “he must drop holy instructions into his children, he must pray for his children and he must give his children discipline. Of the latter, Watson writes, “The rod beats out the dust and moth of sin. A child indulged and humored in wickedness will prove a burden instead of a blessing.”
A man who does spiritual things in a spiritual manner. “Spiritual worship is pure worship…A wicked man either lives in the total neglect of duty or else discharges it in a dull, careless manner…A godly man spiritualizes duty; he is not only for the doing of holy things but for the holy doing of things.”
A man who is thoroughly trained in religion. “A godly man strives to walk according to the full breadth and latitude of God’s law. Every command has the same stamp of divine authority on it, and he who is godly will obey one command as well as another.”
A man who walks with God. Walking with God, for Watson, includes five things: Walking as under God’s eye, the familiarity and intimacy that the soul has with God, walking above the earth (has his heart fixed ultimately on eternal matters), visible piety and continued progress in grace.
A man who strives to be an instrument who makes others godly. “He is not content to go to heaven alone but wants to take others there. Spiders work only for themselves, but bees work for others. A godly man is both a diamond and a lodestone—a diamond for the sparkling of grace and a lodestone for attractiveness. He is always drawings others to embrace piety. Living things have a propagating virtue. Where religion lives in the heart, there will be an endeavor to propagate the life of grace in those we converse with.”

This is no joke... Especially when I consider some issues in my life right now, this is good & needful preparation... I gotta get this sorted out!! God help me...

one mind-boggling thing in my mind...

2010-01-19T11:57:00.006+08:00

When was the last time you hear of someone's stories and experiences, and you begin to wonder why I do not have similar experiences like them? You may be thinking like me "Why can't I state examples like they do and speak with that amount of passion I see in them?" There are some people in my life where every time I hear them speak, I always feel motivated and desire to just be like them. So I would think how I can take wholesale what I heard and share/teach it to others when the opportunity arise. But I realized that after I just take what I hear and deliver it to others, it is soOOOoOooo fake and the effect is soOoOoOoOo different... Of cos one reason is God made all of us different but I think the bigger issue is because I may have the form but am lacking in the substance and inner conviction.

As I thought about this, until my relationship with Him is intimate, it will never be real. Conclusion is this: You can read much, hear much, be touched much but it will never make a difference until you decide to do something about it. We cannot just tide through life and yet hope to make an impact for God with this life we have. I am praying that God will teach me to FORSAKE my personal agendas and aspiration, so as to be FREE to follow God FULLY. I guess when I am conscious of this, the substance and inner conviction will slowly develop and show itself in the way I speak. Then only I think what I say and share will be real and useful to those I speak to. If not, I am just delivering a speech and not a truth.

the power of the tongue

2010-01-14T18:40:00.002+08:00

In just this one month, I realized how powerful words can be and the importance of being careful with them. I see James 3:5 so real,

5 So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things. How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire!

No I am not adding flowery languages to my daily speech but it is words spoken that were meant for good but misinterpreted and not taken well. In this instance should I be angry? Angry that I was misunderstood and feel that it's injustice done on me and lash back at the person so as to 振一口气？

I think the Lord has been gracious to teach me to apologize when need be instead of reacting because I want to show how the other party was wrong but to eat the humble pie and let the debris settle even before attempting to clarify things. It is a frustrating feeling. But this taught me to be wise in the words I choose and not be presumptuous that my intent will always be read correctly. With the brushes I already had, I can only ask the Lord to be one to resolve them. And I do pray that such brushes will not be a regular feature in my life...

nothing comes easy...

2010-01-10T10:22:00.003+08:00

Growing older by the year, there is at least one reality that I am finding to be so true. That nothing comes easy. Everything that I dream of having or hope to maintain is not going to come just by sheer will and thought. I think about my basketball skills, when I did not play for just 1 month has caused me to lose all my ball sense and confidence. I think about my IPPT, how I used to be able to get gold without too much of a trouble but now I have to deliberately take time to prepare and go through a training program, sweat like mad, work like crazy, in order to just maintain the standard. I think of how I need to prepare much much much more for my sessions so that I am not just listing down the teaching points and stating the obvious but describing it relevantly and note-worthy for the audience. There are many more things that comes to my mind but the point is the same. Things don't just happen. Time and effort must be put in. Which caused me to consider once again, "What then will be my one single pursuit with the remaining time the Lord has given me?" I am only going to have this much time and this much energy left and it is not going to increase. How then can I make my life count for God still? What will I choose to focus on? This is will 1 BIG question I will have to come to terms with if I want to live an un-wasted life.

A note to the younger ones based on my experience:
When you are young, your energy and drive can still compensate for some of the short-comings. You will then think that it's ok to do a bit of this and a bit of that, explore here a bit and there. But once you grow older, lethargy and inertia will start to kick in and without strict discipline and clear focus, you will soon begin to lose all the "skills" you used to have. Then you will start to wonder what have I been doing the past many years?! So, don't take your youth for granted! Use it well so that you will not look back at your years and regret the way you have spent them!!

the doulos experience...

2009-12-26T16:17:00.006+08:00

..
Went on-board the Doulos for the first time in my life with Manyiu, Hong Guo, Benjamin and Irwin. Other than the fact that we were catching a movie in vivo city, I wanted to go largely due to the fact that I heard that it will be de-commissioned (a.k.a scrapped) after their visit in Singapore. So up we went and visited the bookshop (that's the only thing to go that's free... haha... the tour need to pay and got specific timing one...) and got some stuff. Benjamin fulfills his promise to me by getting me a red wrist band as a Christmas gift! I bought a book for Manyiu and also a gift for Wenxing's birthday. There's really good bargains up there, a pity that I don't have the resources to get more stuff. Haiz.

One of the things I thought about was this. Doulos, a 1977 ship is recognized in the Guinness Book of World Records as the world's oldest active ocean-going passenger ship and it's motto is to bring knowledge, help and hope wherever they dock. Finally after 32 years, they decided it's time to stop, part of the reason being the cost to maintain an old ship is no joke. What about me? Will I be found actively serving God and stay true to my convictions about service even after 32 years? I have merely been in full time for 3 years and sometimes I already feel the toil of it. How then can I then be like William Borden, a missionary who did not even make it to the mission field who resolutely decided "No Reserves", "No Retreats" & "No Regrets"? This will be one question I need to seek an answer to in the coming year...

One Hope One Christmas

2009-12-24T23:00:00.000+08:00

I found this year's CCIS very meaningful and I enjoyed my time helping out over the 2 days though my legs might beg to differ (signs of old age). Of cos, the people who were helping alongside made the experience even better. :) The theme for CCIS this year is One Christmas, One Hope. And to keep true to the theme, the committee decided to put up something where people can write their hopes and wishes this Christmas, and if it is something meaningful and realistic, they would grant that wish! And that is how the "Tree of Hope" came about.

Other than the usual "Talk to my hand" responses I got, it was fun getting and watching other people write down their hopes and staple it on the "Tree of Hope". From standard wishes like "World Peace", "Good Health", to people wanting PSPs, IPhones etc., there were also many noble and meaningful wishes that people put up. Like to give the children in a particular home a sponsored outing and one which I particularly like is to see one little kid write, "I wish that my dad will stop smoking and gambling..."

As I see the people flocking by to just write down their wishes, it showed me one thing. That we all have hopes, knowingly or unknowingly. And it is with hope that we find meaning in living. And unlike the way we use the word "hope" nowadays, when the word "hope" is used in the Bible, it brings with it a surety and "confirm will happen one" meaning. I do not know how many people will get their hopes granted from the "Tree of Hope", but I know at least I have the hope of a better place to look forward to in the future. And I am sure glad to have received this gift though I do not deserve it.

and the gift goes on...

2009-12-20T23:04:00.002+08:00

It's coming to the time of the year again, Christmas. This year's Christmas is relatively special for me. Not because I won anything or received something great or found a girlfriend. But it's simply because I had the opportunity to re-look into the Christmas story again and again and again while preparing to equip students to share this story to their friends and for a session I had to take to share with a youth group this age old story. Probably the older one gets, the more easy it is for one to take this age old story for granted. But as I prepared and even shared this to various people, I'm finding it more and more amazing, more and more unbelievable. Amazing that God would actually plan this even before creation and unbelievable that Jesus would choose to come as a baby in a manger for you and me.

Isa 9:6 says,
6 For to us a child is born,
to us a son is given;
and the government shall be upon his shoulder,
and his name shall be called
Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,
Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.

People have given sermons just focusing on this verse alone but in my finite understanding and preparation, this is indeed the greatest gift that God has given us. Reason being:

As the Wonderful Counselor, He came to show and teach us the right way to live our lives purposefully
As the Mighty God, He came and perform great miracles, healings and signs. But the greatest act was when He died on the cross for you and me even though He did no wrong
As the Everlasting Father, He did not stay in the grave but rose again to show us that He can indeed save and deliver us from our biggest problem
As the Prince of Peace, He has reconciled us, who were once enemies with God, back to Him once again

Indeed this is one gift you and I should not miss out on because the best part of this gift is that it is freely given to us. Such a reminder refreshes me and gives me hope in this world though things can get difficult at times. May it refresh you as much as it did for me. Blessed Christmas!! :)

am I willing...

2009-11-29T09:02:00.004+08:00

I learnt something from yesterday's YF brothers session on BGR. No doubt I was asked to go help facilitate and help the younger bros in this particular issue, I think I gained a lot of insight from it as well. And here's one takeaway I wanna share to remind myself with.

My Elder was answering this question, "When will I know that I am ready to start a relationship?" and he shared many good and relevant principles for us to consider. And the first one was "When you are willing to remain single for Christ's sake, that is a pre-requisite to marriage." Sounds weird doesn't it? But there is much value in this statement. Because only when one is contented to remain single for the Lord's sake, only then will one be patient to wait for the Lord to send the right one into his/her life rather than start fabricating and scheming your way to get the heart of the other. I recall how I told the Lord I would want to start looking for a life partner from May '09 and now it's already Nov '09 with not much progress. Will I then because of my impatience start to be unthinking and careless in the way I deal with the sisters around me? This is a timely reminder for myself to be sober minded and not react to pressure or circumstances. The other reason why that principle is a pre-requisite is because it will help one to have self-control and not "cross the line" during the dating/courtship phase. Again it is patience. Patience to wait for things that ought to be done during marriage and not the exploring phase, done ONLY at the marriage phase! If I am prepared to remain single for God, then at no point during the exploring phase should I ever think that she belongs to me and defraud her by not treating her honorably in the process.

These are hard teachings, especially in a society that speaks otherwise. But like I always remind myself, "Normal doesn't mean right, Tough doesn't mean wrong".

interesting experience

2009-11-24T08:59:00.003+08:00

I was setting up the abseil tower last week and everything seem to go as normal... So as usual, once I finished setting up the 2 lanes, I abseiled myself down. But what was interesting is I suddenly felt fearful! Usually when I conduct programs, it always seem to be an easy peasy thing for me to abseil down, but I don't know why, that day, while I was on my way down, I found myself thinking, "what if the rope give way?", "what if the anchor comes off?", and many other "what ifs". Thinking that maybe it's due to my "too long never abseil liao" syndrome, I went for a second round! But the same fear resided in me...

As I look back at the incident, I am reminded how finite and limited I am as a person. Remembering what Michael taught during church service last Sunday in Psalms 39,

⁴ "Show me, O LORD, my life's end
and the number of my days;
let me know how fleeting is my life.
⁵ You have made my days a mere handbreadth;
the span of my years is as nothing before you.
Each man's life is but a breath.
Selah
⁶ Man is a mere phantom as he goes to and fro:
He bustles about, but only in vain;
he heaps up wealth, not knowing who will get it.
⁷ "But now, Lord, what do I look for?
My hope is in you.

By myself as a person, I am really nothing. Only when I see and live my life in reference to God then can I find true significance, worth and security with this life I have. Thank God for this privillage to have come to know Him!

remember your Creator in the days of your youth...

2009-11-04T18:38:00.002+08:00

Was preparing for a sharing with my youth fellowship and I thought it will be useful for me to blog it down to remind myself the very things I shared with them in a forum setting:

In one statement, what is your advice to young people today?

Make ALL you do Today, an INVESTMENT in the Eternal tomorrow. (borrowed words from Alan Catchpoole)

Sometimes as Christians, we live disjointed lives, thinking that what we do now on earth has no bearing on our future in heaven. But if we truly understand what heaven is like, we will then know that God is simply restoring us back to what He originally created us for, a life without sin. So it is not so much a reset button He is pressing but a progressive change that is happening.

Have you ever found life boring? Why?

Of cos! Who doesn't in his/her lifetime? Why? Because the things we get ourselves involved in is never fully and totally satisfying. We will always be searching and trying things out this lifetime until we can arrive to a conclusion/thing which can take us through life. It is like a polar bear will only find true satisfaction when it is in the north pole/arctic circle. The zoo can do all they can to give the polar bear the simulated enviroment and chunky fish but it will never fully satisfy it. Similarly, what this world offers can never fully satisfy us. That's why we get bored. Music, fashion, games, they all keep changing cos they cannot fully satisfy. The sad thing is many of us are happy with what the world throws at us. But if we truly know the potential we are suppose to reach and have, we are missing out a lot in life.

How did you truly find satisfaction in God when there are many other attractive things?

It's difficult. I think there will always be this constant struggle. One moment we may think that we have overcomed an attraction, another attraction will draw our attention away. One way to ease that is when we know what truly matters. Think of a kid. Between the choice of his favorite gummy bear and a blank cheque, which one do you think he will take? Reason is simple. He don't understand the value of what the piece of paper can bring to him. And interestingly, here we are laughing at how "blur" that kid is but when someone older look at us, that is the same response they will give when they look at the way some of us are living and making decisions in life. It is interesting that Solomon asked us to remember our CREATOR. Why not remember your God? Or remember your Father? Because if we remember or know who made us and what He made us for, we will know how to live life in a satisfying way. Since He made us, He knows what will satisfy. Know who God truly is. Understand that. That might just help you find satisfaction in God greater than what the world can offer. We can either learn from fools or end up being the fool for people to learn from. I believe that there is nothing wrong with the attractive things in this world. I don't think God would want us to forgo wisdom and be stupid or to dress shabbily and portray an unkempt image. The only difference is it must be done in and within God's set boundary. Now that will be satisfying.

evan almighty

2009-11-02T12:56:00.007+08:00

Movies are always interesting... There is always something to learn from it, be it good or bad. Was at the Xinmin POD where they decided to screen Evan Almighty. Seeing it for a second time does cause me to look out for some of the finer details that would have just fly past me the first time I watched it. And this is THE quote of the movie, IMHO:

"Let me ask you something. If someone prays for patience, you think God gives them patience? Or does he give them the opportunity to be patient? If he prayed for courage, does God give him courage, or does he give him opportunities to be courageous? If someone prayed for the family to be closer, do you think God zaps them with warm fuzzy feelings, or does he give them opportunities to love each other?"

I'm not sure if the director is a Christian, but this is a quote with biblical grounding. Living in a society that demands instant and pain free results, this is one hard truth to swallow. It is a shame that many Christians do not understand this truth. But it does teach me one thing. Be careful what I pray for. And be prepared for it. :)

prayer 101

2009-10-26T18:41:00.003+08:00

Last week's prayer gathering was interesting... No because I play the guitar out of rhythm a couple of times but the way the initiator was describing the different "types" of prayer. And they are:

* Conditional prayer
- We tell God, "If you answer this prayer of mine, I promise to go to church/do my Q.T/ tithe more etc."

* Threatening prayer
- We threaten God to answer our prayers by saying, "If you don't answer my prayer, I will not serve in this ministry and not give time to read your word..."

* Extortion prayer
- We demand God to answer our prayers saying, "God, you are so powerful, surely sharing a bit of wealth with me is not a problem rite?"

* Resignation prayer
- We simply give up and tell God "I give up, I don't want to do anything anymore"

It may sound comical but I can identify times when such thots do cross my mind, especially the resignation prayer lately. Is this the way God wants us to approach Him in prayer? Definitely not. It is a relationship. We don't talk like that in relationship so why should we be like this when we are communing with God?

Help me learn to communicate rightly with you, Lord...

shocking!!

2009-10-14T00:01:00.002+08:00

My blog is now 1 year old!! Simply amazing... Amazing because I didn't think that I can sustain this blog for so long... I guess it was a good time to remind myself whether this blog has lived to serve it's purpose. There are just so many things I can be grateful to God for, just that my laziness has hindered it from being published. But all in all, I thank God for this channel of giving and do pray that even in the coming year, I would be more disciplined to blog down God's goodness in my life.

He is Our El-Roi

2009-10-13T14:05:00.000+08:00

Thought I should record down the testimony I gave in my church service a month ago to remind and remind and remind and remind me again and again and again when the going gets tough. So below is a transcript of what I shared:

Have u ever felt really really down and just dun feel like carrying on? I felt like this just 2 weeks ago when I was tasked to plan for a particular project. I felt like Job (read Job 3:1-4, 11, 24-26), cursing the day I was tasked with the project when i was thrown by a barrage of questions and issues. With my 13 years as a Christian and 3 years ++ in full time ministry, I still thot I had experienced enuff difficulties to be able to handle anything. But this time was so bad, I could hardly put up a smile. So it was kind of fake, where I had to put up a smile in front of students but then after that, I sink into what young people would term as 'emo-ness'.

The thought of running away and giving up was very strong. I tried to reason with myself saying that since there's no joy, might as well don't do since we are supposed to serve God cheerfully. But God reminded me, through songs, people, book but especially His Word, that running away is not the solution! The flesh always thinks about running away on the sight of difficulty because it is not within it's comfort zone but running away when it comes to serving Him has never been a solution in God's dictionary. I think of Jonah, Moses, Joshua etc.

Allow me to share with you just one thing that helped me bounce back and shook me up to put me in the right perspective when it comes to serving Him. I am currently doing my devotion on the different names of God, and God very timely showed me that He is a God who sees, our El-Roi. (Gen 16:13) Even though people may not know what is going on within me, even though it may seem like an impossible task ahead, God sees all these things. And if He sees, I can be assured that He is in control and on top of the situation. He is not a God who sees but is helpless or a God who likes to see me suffer. He is moulding me. This simple truth turned me around.

I do not know if I will fall again, but one thing I know: He is my El-Roi, the God who sees. Finally it is not what I can do, but what God can do through me. And if God called me to the task, I can be sure that He will qualify me for the task ahead!

But what actually comforted me the most about the experience God put me through is that it was an encouragement to the others in my church (at least 2 that I know of). I guess that's when I must be mindful of all that the Lord puts me through because it can be a source of encouragement and comfort for others around me.

what's necessary is often not what's easy

2009-10-12T13:21:00.002+08:00

I bought my grandma out to eat yesterday and I must say that it is quite a feat to do it by myself. At many points I felt my patience running think and begin thinking to myself, "Why am I doing this?". First of all, walking to the restaurant alone is a challenge in itself. Given the condition of my grandma, it took us 30min before we reach the place which I would usually only take 7min. Then upon reaching the place, she started complaining and say "Why come here? Waste money.". Within me I was like, "Hello, I bring you out to eat, just eat can?". What's the saddest part for me is throughout the whole journey to and fro and the meal, I tried to strike conversations with her but somehow it just couldn't connect. I either get a blank look or a disconnected reply. Apparently the only thing that gets her talking is when she complains about my sister and my father.

As I reflected upon the whole encounter, my first reaction is to give up and not bring her out too often next time. But God timely sent 2 reminders, through a sister and a brother, to tell me to not give up but press on because this is something necessary. I guess what my grandma wants is just to spend time with her, physically. So though I may not be able to strike a conversation this time round, I can always try again the next time. I can't expect a ONE time immediate effect to take place with my ONE time effort. And though it may feel a little irritating and frustrating at times, if I don't keep showing concern for her, I may not have the opportunity to do so next time. I guess these are good enough reasons for me to bring her out more often the next time. :)

My first sec sch frd wedding...

2009-10-02T16:17:00.004+08:00

Upon attending my sec sch friend's wedding, lots of thots flashed through my mind. How I used to follow him around and see him thrash up other guys outside the school, to studying with him at Chinese Swimming Club for our 'O' levels to working out together to losing contact with him for a while then finally catching up again over supper at blk 85 (thx to FB), it has been quite a memorable journey with this friend of mine. And of cos, the thing I *salute* him for the most is the fact that the girl he is marrying is our classmate whom they have been around together since then and now finally tying the knot. It is good to know that such faithfulness and 专一-ness still exist! In a society where people are switching relationships like changing clothes, there are still people out there working to make their relationships work rather than breaking up when the going gets tough. So, keep it up bro! I wish you 2 a blessed marriage and may you 2 be drawn closer to God as you are now together as one.

tangle...

2009-09-17T09:55:00.003+08:00

Tangle.com has tons of good stuff... Let me share with you 2.

Plastic Jesus

This video clip captures very well how easy it is for us to present an infallible self when actually within us, our life is in a mess. One can profess to be a Christian. But how real is He in our life? In my life? When I saw this video, it really reminded me of how I was when I was in secondary school. On the outside, I seem fine and doing ok in my walk with God. But inside, it's a mess. What I present myself to be outside is so not coherent with who I am truly inside. And if I am not careful, it gets even worst as I grow older as a Christian with more "textbook" answers I can give to people who ask questions. I'll have to learn to be honest. To God, to myself and to others.

Josh Wilson - Savior, Please

I like this song a lot. Other than the cool guitar skills involved, the lyrics captures very well the helpless state man is in, in trying to reach God. Especially in such a fast-paced life like S'pore, it is easy to get caught in a whirlwind of activities but come out of it tired and unsatisfied. Only when we turn to the Savior and ask for His help then can we truly stand.

Savior, Please
Savior, please take my hand .
I work so hard, I live so fast.
This life begins, then it ends.
And then I do the best that I can,
but I don't know how long I'll last.

I try to be so tough,
but I'm just not strong enough.
I can't do this alone, God I need you
to hold on to me.
I try to be good enough,
but I'm nothing without your love.
Savior, please keep saving me.

Savior, please help me stand.
I fall so hard, I fade so fast.
Will you begin right where I end?
And be the God of all I am because you're all I have.

Hallelujah!
Everything you are to me
is everything I'll ever need.
and i am learning to believe
cause you're the one who's saving me.

Lord I want to know You...

2009-09-15T22:06:00.000+08:00

Been reading up this devotion on the various names of God used in the Bible and it has been interesting and refreshing so far. Thot I should consolidate my thots by blogging it down so as to help me remember what I learnt...

He is Elohim (God The Creator)
Remembering why God made us is important. That way, we can truly live life the way it was intended to be. And from Scriptures, we know that we are created for His Glory and thus we represent Him (Isa 43) and we are created for His Pleasure and thus we do His Will (Rev 4:11)

He is El-Elyon (God Most High)
Knowing that He is the Most High is assuring. Though the external circumstances may seem to go against us, we can still trust that He is in control. Job is the perfect example to learn from. Though the circumstances dealt on him seems crazy (i.e. lost of children, property, wealth, health), he held on to what He believed and understood God to be and finally walked out of the situation victorious.

He is El-Roi (God who sees)
Understanding that He is a God who sees is comforting. Comforting to know that the moments when I am down and no one knows, He does. Comforting to know that when I am wronged, I do not need to vindicate myself for God will do so during Judgement Day. Comforting to know that God is still on top of the situation even though the circumstances may seem dire. This is especially real last week when within me I was struggling with the responsibilities I had to do. The feeling of giving up and that no one seems to understand was very real. But remembering that the Lord sees, I am comforted to know that He knows and that He is watching over me though I may think that I cannot handle it anymore.

Some call such an understanding about God as mystical/superstitious/fictitious. To think that there is "someone" who made us for a purpose, who is in control of everything and who sees and understands what we are going through may seem unbelievable and too nice a thing to be. But if God is truly who He said Himself to be, shouldn't it drive one to hope, trust and comfort instead? At least it did for me... It makes living on this world purposeful...

music is the language of the heart 12

2009-09-12T13:51:00.003+08:00

One of my favorite songs in Leeland's new album "Love is on the move"...

My Jesus
Here on the bank I stand.
But in the water is the hope of man.
Unclean, I fall before You now.
Jesus, come wash me inside out.

I'm running to the water now.
I'm running to the water now.

And I'm lost in Your love and Your mercy.
Lord, Your beauty is so overwhelming.
I'm thankful for Your truth.
I'm so in love with You.
My Jesus, My Jesus.
.
Here on the bank I stand.
But in the water is the hope of man.
Unclean, I fall before You now.
Jesus, come wash me inside out.

I'm running to the water now, oh
I'm running to the water now.

And I'm lost in Your love and Your mercy.
Lord, Your beauty is so overwhelming.
I'm thankful for Your truth.
I'm so in love with You.
My Jesus, My Jesus.

(Yeah, yeah)

(Oh)
All things are new again.
Covered in waters of love I stand.
All my chains are broken.

(Oh, Whoa)
All things are new again.
Covered in waters of love I stand.
All my chains are broken.
'Cause I'm washed inside Your ocean.

I'm running to the water now.
(Running to the water now)
I'm running to the water now.

And I'm lost in Your love and Your mercy.
Lord, Your beauty is so overwhelming.
I'm thankful for Your truth.
I'm so in love with You.
My Jesus, My Jesus.

And I'm lost in Your love and Your mercy.
Lord, Your beauty is so overwhelming.
I'm thankful for Your truth.
I'm so in love with You.
My Jesus, Oh, My Jesus.

(Oh)
You make all things new.
You're so good to me Lord (yeah)
(Oh, yeah)
So thankful Lord, so thankful Lord.
(Oh)
I'm new creation, You make all things new oh Lord.
(Yeah)
You are my salvation.
You are just so beautiful.
I'm a new creation, You make all things new. Oh, Lord.

We love You.
We love You.
So in love with You...

FIGHT for joy!

2009-09-09T11:26:00.006+08:00

I think it is always not good to pull a long face when you are feeling down. So thanks to all who have endured my "attitude" and responded with encouragement and patience. This was an email sent by a brother, written by John Piper, urging the Christian to fight for joy. It is interesting to remember that joy must be fought for and not wished for. So may this 15 points lead me to the authentic joy that God would want me to have!

1. Realize that authentic joy in God is a gift.
2. Realize that joy must be fought for relentlessly.
3. Resolve to attack all known sin in your life.
4. Learn the secret of gutsy guilt - how to fight like a justified sinner.
5. Realize that the battle is primarily a fight to see God for who he is.
6. Meditate on the Word of God day and night.
7. Pray earnestly and continually for open heart-eyes and an inclination for God.
8. Learn to preach to yourself rather than listen to yourself.
9. Spend time with God-saturated people who help you see God and fight the fight.
10. Be patient in the night of God's seeming absence.
11. Get the rest and exercise proper diet that your body was designed by God to have.
12. Make a proper use of God's revelation in nature.
13. Read great books about God and biographies of great saints.
14. Do the hard and loving thing for the sake of others (witness and mercy).
15. Get a global vision for the cause of Christ and pour yourself out for the unreached.

CHIONG ARH!!!
(P.S: It is interesting at the point when I am typing this, SOMEONE reminded me of my 2 "favorite" quotes:

"Pain is the highest level of comfort"

"Pain is weakness leaving the body"

God is SoooOoOooo interesting...)

have i lost heart?

2009-09-06T23:01:00.003+08:00

The whole process of getting upset and discouraged over the responsibility that is assigned to me is starting to come once again. It gets pretty frustrating because there are just some things I cannot come to terms with. On one hand, I recognize the truth that sometimes we simply need to learn to do the things we need to do, not just the things we want to do. But when we lose joy in doing that something, knowing that serving God is suppose to be a joyful thing, where then does the problem lie? Of cos the answer is my self but I need a clearer answer as I do feel that I am losing heart. I guess I need to seek and pray more about it to really come to terms with the issue at hand. Meantime, just gotta be faithful and prayfully the Lord will show me the way to go...

An uplifting song... (music is the language of the heart 11)

2009-09-01T20:35:00.001+08:00

Sometimes songs really just eases the tension and have a therapeutic effect... More so when the songs speak of the confidence we have in a God who did so much for us, it really does give one strength to carry on though the going is tough...

This Is Our God

VERSE 1:

Your grace is enough

More than I need

At Your word I will believe

I wait for You

Draw near again

Let Your Spirit make me new

CHORUS:

I will fall at Your feet

And I will worship You here

VERSE 2:

Your presence in me

Jesus light the way

By the power of Your word

I am restored

I am redeemed

By Your Spirit I am free

BRIDGE:

Freely You gave it all for us

Surrendered Your life upon that cross

Great is the love

Poured out for all

This is our God

Lifted on high from death to life

Forever our God is glorified

Servant and King

Rescued the world

This is our God

follow the heart? or follow the mind?

2009-08-24T17:19:00.004+08:00

It seems that recently the thing that keeps popping up is this whole thing about mission statements and principles... It gets a bit technical and my sinful self tells me to don't bother thinking about it but I guess it is necessary if I want to live a principled life and not a emotion-led life. Below are some things I will need to think about:

1) Reasons for getting married
2) Rules of engagement during dating, courtship and marriage phase
3) Basis for spending
4) Basis for giving
5) Correcting a student
6) Leading the team
7) Why I am still in full time ministry

I guess there will be many more principles I will need to sort out in my life. As much as possible, I would want to be able to give a biblical basis for every decision I make and not a "I do it because I do it lor..." mentality. My church recently asked how we would define "success". I define it this way, "Able to live a life that others want to emulate because it reflects who Christ is". Living a principled life is a must, if I want to leave something worth emulating for those I lead and meet.

coaching...

2009-08-17T13:32:00.004+08:00

One of the hope I always and still have, is that somehow through my opportunities to coach, I may use it as an opportunity to bring in the gospel to the students I meet. But my perspective towards coaching took a slight changed when I came across this quote/example from an article I read:

"The former Leeds United chaplain, John Jackson, used to say, “I don’t go to the football club to take God in. He is already there. I just go in case he needs an errand boy!”"

That should be the perspective I hold as a Christian. I am not in ministry to start something, I am there to be an instrument to be used by God.

questions questions questions...

2009-08-08T09:32:00.002+08:00

call me a cheapo but there are really many other good articles out there that are very helpful to help me think through issues in my life. And below is a list of questions John Piper penned down to help one think about when preparing for marriage which will provide me good guidelines as I think through this issue myself: (edited a little)

Theology

What do you believe about...everything?
Discover how you form your views. What is the reasoning-believing process? How do you handle the Bible?

Worship and Devotion

How important is corporate worship? Other participation in church life?
How important is it to be part of a small accountability/support group?
What is the importance of music in life and worship?
What are your daily personal devotional practices? Prayer, reading, meditation, memorization.
What would our family devotions look like? Who leads out in this?
Are we doing this now in an appropriate way: praying together about our lives and future, reading the Bible together?

Husband and Wife

What is the meaning of headship and submission in the Bible and in our marriage?
What are expectations about situations where one of you might be alone with someone of the opposite sex?
How are tasks shared in the home: cleaning, cooking, washing dishes, yard work, car upkeep, repairs, shopping for food, and household stuff?
What are the expectations for togetherness?
What is an ideal non-special evening?
How do you understand who and how often sex is initiated?
Who does the checkbook—or are there two?

Children

If and when, should we have children? Why?
How many?
How far apart?
Would we consider adoption?
What are the standards of behavior?
What are the appropriate ways to discipline them? How many strikes before they’re...whatever?
What are the expectations of time spent with them and when they go to bed?
What signs of affection will you show them?
What about school? Home school? Christian school? Public school?

Lifestyle

Own a home or not? Why?
What kind of neighborhood? Why?
View of money in general. How much to the church?
How do you make money decisions?
Where will you buy clothes: Department store? Thrift store? In between? Why?

Entertainment

How much money should we spend on entertainment?
How often should we eat out? Where?
What kind of vacations are appropriate and helpful for us?
How many gadgets?
Should we have a television? Where? What is fitting to watch? How much?
What are the criteria for movies and theater? What will our guidelines be for the kids?

Conflict

What makes you angry?
How do you handle your frustration or anger?
Who should bring up an issue that is bothersome?
What if we disagree both about what should be done, and whether it is serious?
Will we go to bed angry at each other?
What is our view of getting help from friends or counselors?

Work

Who is the main breadwinner?
Should the wife work outside the home? Before kids? With kids at home? After kids?
What are your views of daycare for children?
What determines where you will locate? Job? Whose job? Church? Family?

Friends

Is it good to do things with friends but without spouse?
What will you do if one of you really likes to hang out with so and so and the other doesn’t?

Health and Sickness

Do you have, or have you had any, sicknesses or physical problems that could affect our relationship? (Allergies, cancer, eating disorders, venereal disease, etc.)
Do you believe in divine healing and how would prayer relate to medical attention?
How do you think about exercise and healthy eating?
Do you have any habits that adversely affect health?

Awesome~!

Is this God's Will?

2009-08-06T11:56:00.003+08:00

This was something I read and I found it really practical to help any Christian to have a good "feel" as to whether what they do and what Scriptures say are coherent. Students always ask, "How do I know if this is what God wants me to do?" Here's 12 rules that will hopefully guide us when we engage with Scriptures:

If I find something with which I cannot agree, I am wrong.
If I find something which I cannot understand, I am wrong to judge it on that account. Here Lyons gives an unforgettable quote from the great D.M. Lloyd-Jones: "You have a very small brain and you have a very poor spirit within you; do not be surprised that you cannot understand."
If I find something which would contradict the clear teaching of Scripture elsewhere, I cannot be right.
If I find something which would slander the revealed character of God, I am certainly wrong.
If I find something which brings up an apparent contradiction, I am wrong not to face it squarely.
If I find something which leads to a summary principle, I am wrong if I do not follow it to its conclusion.
If I find something which disturbs my settled convictions, I am wrong to dismiss it on that account.
If I find something which calls for decisive action and I remain inert, I am fatally wrong.
If I find something which I dare not follow in its practical drift, I am destructively wrong.
If I find something which others blush to admit or struggle to avoid, I am unwise to follow them at that point. A great quote from Calvin: "The delicacy of those who affect an appearance of greater prudence than the Holy Spirit in removing or resolving difficulties, is quite intolerable."
If I find something upon which popular religion frowns, I may presume I am on the right track. C.H. Spurgeon famously said, "Be assured there is nothing new in theology except that which is false."
If I find something which would tend to humble man and glorify God, I am most probably right.

~ taken from a cbmw blog article...